Monkey Musings Daily Open Discussion #11 6/12 - 10/04/2008

[Blue Moon]

Klaas,

You house is sooooooo beautiful.  I love the color combinations. The fireplace is just beautiful.  I know you are so glad it is about over.  Your deadline was met (you got to have your 4th of July party). 

Hope everyone had a great 4th.  I cooked all day.  Went to the Menonites and bought corn, cabbage, green beans, potatoes, peaches and had a BIG feast.  Fireworks were mostly rained out here so watched neighbors setting off their own.  Good day for us.

[Blonde]

Sheba loves her new friend.

[Blonde]

Sheba also loves fish food and I have to give her some or she tries to get his food (not him)
They sleep together 

[Blonde]

Klaas wow looking good

[klaasend]

An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for years.
 
He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some orange trees. The pond was ideal for swimming, although he rarely did that anymore.
 
One evening he decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket with which to bring back some fruit.
 
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.  He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
 
One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"
 
The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or to make you get out of the pond naked."
 
Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."
 
Moral: Old men can still think fast.


 

[LouiseVargas]

Good one, Klaas!
 

[Shell]

Test, trying to get back to my regular avatar.

[Shell]

Test, trying to get back to my regular avatar.

Okay I did it.

Obs, when one has that much moola, you bet they are good looking. 

[crazybabyborg]

Whew! I was ready for a change too, Shell!

We're good now until Halloween!   

[friend of monkeys]

An elderly man in Florida had owned a large farm for years.
 
He had a large pond in the back, fixed up nice; picnic tables, horseshoe courts, and some orange trees. The pond was ideal for swimming, although he rarely did that anymore.
 
One evening he decided to go down to the pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over. He grabbed a five gallon bucket with which to bring back some fruit.
 
As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.  He made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.
 
One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"
 
The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or to make you get out of the pond naked."
 
Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator."
 
Moral: Old men can still think fast.


 

good one cutie!
I have missed u monkeys.  just here for a quick hello.
hoping all are well!

[2NJSons_Mom]

Hi, FOM.....hope all is well with you.     

[klaasend]

ANNOUNCEMENT!!

PLEASE WELCOME OUR NEWEST MODERATOR

BLONDE

Blonde has years of experience moderating forums and I am really going to appreciate her help!  Thanks for offering Blonde!

[2NJSons_Mom]

Why did the chicken cross the road?


BARACK OBAMA:
The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE!  The chicken wanted CHANGE!

JOHN MC CAIN:
My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON:
When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the
road.  This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure-- right from Day One! --that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road.  But then, this really isn't about me.......

DR. PHIL:
The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on 'THIS' side of the road before it goes after the
problem on the 'OTHER SIDE' of the road.  What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his 'CURRENT' problems before adding 'NEW' problems.

OPRAH:
Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad.  So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I 'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

GEORGE W. BUSH:
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.  We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not.  The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL:
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the
chicken crossing the road...

ANDERSON COOPER - CNN:
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

JOHN KERRY:
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against
it!  It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's
intentions.  I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

NANCY GRACE:
That chicken crossed the road because he's GUILTY!  You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American!

MARTHA STEWART:
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going.  I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level.  No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road?  Did he cross it with a toad?  Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die in the rain.  Alone.

JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay!  Can't you people see the plain truth?  That's why they call it the 'other side.'  Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay.
And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too.  I say we boycott all
chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.'  That chicken should not be crossing the road.  It's as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA:
In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.  Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS:
Isn't that interesting?  In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken
tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a
serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its life long dream of
crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON:
Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.
Internet Explorer is an integral part of the Chicken.  This new platform is much more stable and will never cra...#@&&ampC% .........reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE:
I invented the chicken!

COLONEL SANDERS:
Did I miss one?

DICK CHENEY:
Where's my gun?

AL SHARPTON:
Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens
 

 

[klaasend]

OMG I can invision this so clearly 

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,378142,00.html

Woman Shoots Herself While Trying to Kill Mice
Tuesday , July 08, 2008

POTTER VALLEY, Calif. —

A Mendocino County woman who was trying to kill mice in her trailer with a gun ended up shooting herself and another person.

The 43-year-old woman pulled out her .44-caliber Magnum revolver after she saw the mice scurrying across the floor of her trailer on Highway 20 in Potter Valley, sheriff's officials said.

But she accidentally dropped the gun, which went off as it struck the floor. The bullet went through the woman's kneecap, bounced off the keys sitting on the belt loop of a 42-year-old man in the trailer and grazed the man's groin before ending up in his coin pocket.

Authorities did not release the shooting victims' names.

The mice escaped the shooting unharmed.   

[2NJSons_Mom]

   Why didn't she just get a cat...

[GreatOwl]

  Why didn't she just get a cat...

City Ordinance prohibits cats, but allows guns, perhaps????javascript:void(0);

[MuffyBee]

This is also posted under JonBenet Ramsey's Unsolved Crime Thread.

Jul 9, 3:45 PM EDT

Prosecutor: DNA clears JonBenet Ramsey's family


BOULDER, Colo. (AP) -- Prosecutors say new DNA tests have cleared JonBenet Ramsey's family in the 1996 killing of the 6-year-old beauty queen.

Boulder County District Attorney Mary Lacy said Wednesday the tests point to an "unexplained third party."

She says prosecutors don't consider any member of the Ramsey family to be a suspect.

JonBenet's parents, John and Patsy Ramsey, were long said to be under an "umbrella of suspicion" in the girl's slaying.

Lacy apologized to the family on Wednesday, saying, "To the extent that this office has added to the distress suffered by the Ramsey family at any time or to any degree, I offer my deepest apology."

John Ramsey, a software entrepreneur, has said in interviews he believes the case will be solved.

Patsy Ramsey died June 24, 2006 of ovarian cancer at the age of 49 in Atlanta, where the family moved after JonBenet's death.

http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/J/JONBENET_RAMSEY?SITE=FLTAM&SECTION=US

[Sam]

2NJsonsmom,

I loved the chicken joke. Sent it to lots of friends.

Muffee , so glad you put the report in the JonBenet Ramsey thread. I signed in to put it in as well.
I also hope this will finally give that poor family peace from all the speculation about them. JMHO

[2NJSons_Mom]

2NJsonsmom,

I loved the chicken joke. Sent it to lots of friends.

Muffee , so glad you put the report in the JonBenet Ramsey thread. I signed in to put it in as well.
I also hope this will finally give that poor family peace from all the speculation about them. JMHO

YW, Sam.  I thought it was clever and we all can use a chuckle.

I, too, thank Muffee for the Ramsey report...I also heard it on the news, tonight.  John Ramsey's lawyer said they hope that some day the murderer will be caught randomly, due to this DNA.  Hope so.

[2NJSons_Mom]

My husband found this article and saved it for me to read.  I thought some might want to read it here, so here is the link.  It's long, otherwise I'd copy the whole thing.

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/eticket/story?page=hospice&lpos=spotlight&lid=tab1pos1