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Author Topic: JSM's BEGGING FOR BANNING #30 1/01/12 -  (Read 503867 times)
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Bearlyhere
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« Reply #2160 on: February 27, 2012, 06:44:40 AM »



Good Morning Can!  How is everything?  How is your brother and all of your family?

Good Morning Monkeys!   

 
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« Reply #2161 on: February 27, 2012, 06:53:46 AM »

Bearly!  How are you and yours? 

Hanging in.  I have a bit of a cold and my Mom can't use the washer and dryer on her floor this week.  For some reason that means I have to go and do the wash there.  I sometimes do it anyway, but this week I have to.

 



Look after your cold. 
Does that mean you have to take the laundry to another floor and do it?

Yes.  My Mom has an elevator right outside her room, there is only 2 floors, the laundry room is across from the elevator on both floors, and she has an electric wheelchair and the wash fits on it upstairs where she is.   The floor is being tiled this week, Monday to Friday.  She didn't do the wash this weekend because she said my Dad was in a bad mood Saturday so she didn't visit him on Sunday and didn't take his wash either Saturday or Sunday (I have a feeling she did not see him on Saturday either).  He is in the medical part of the facility.  My Mom is a nurse and visits her friends no matter what mood they are in.  I don't like being taken advantage of, especially when I have my own doctor upset with the amount I have been doing for her.  She manages to do a lot of social activities and she volunteers for others, but not my Dad.

Sorry to complain, but I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.  She wants me to come every day and take the wash home with me, but there is no reason to do that.  I also have my Son and his appointments to go to and my eye doctor appointment.  My car got hit almost a month ago and I have not had time to take it to get fixed.

Rant over.

 

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4 Donks
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« Reply #2162 on: February 27, 2012, 09:01:52 AM »

Bearly!  How are you and yours? 

Hanging in.  I have a bit of a cold and my Mom can't use the washer and dryer on her floor this week.  For some reason that means I have to go and do the wash there.  I sometimes do it anyway, but this week I have to.

 



Look after your cold. 
Does that mean you have to take the laundry to another floor and do it?

Yes.  My Mom has an elevator right outside her room, there is only 2 floors, the laundry room is across from the elevator on both floors, and she has an electric wheelchair and the wash fits on it upstairs where she is.   The floor is being tiled this week, Monday to Friday.  She didn't do the wash this weekend because she said my Dad was in a bad mood Saturday so she didn't visit him on Sunday and didn't take his wash either Saturday or Sunday (I have a feeling she did not see him on Saturday either).  He is in the medical part of the facility.  My Mom is a nurse and visits her friends no matter what mood they are in.  I don't like being taken advantage of, especially when I have my own doctor upset with the amount I have been doing for her.  She manages to do a lot of social activities and she volunteers for others, but not my Dad.

Sorry to complain, but I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.  She wants me to come every day and take the wash home with me, but there is no reason to do that.  I also have my Son and his appointments to go to and my eye doctor appointment.  My car got hit almost a month ago and I have not had time to take it to get fixed.

Rant over.

 



Prayers heading your way Bearly. an angelic monkey
I am going to add my rant to yours. Where is Bearly in all this ? If you don't take care of yourself you won't be able to take care of anyone else......time to put Bearly 1st for a bit.
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« Reply #2163 on: February 27, 2012, 09:17:08 AM »

For Bearly- you rant on, that is what we are here for.  I feel your pain of being in a rock and a hard place with your parents.  As for the laundry, is it really about you coming to do the laundry or is it she just wants to give someone directives?  I don't know in your situation but I have found often times it is not the task at hand but control of one another.

4donks is right- take care of yourself first.

We just found out that Mom is going to be moved from the memory care over to Assisted Living maybe this week. That is one of the first things she asked me was who was going to do her laundry.  (I wanted to say maybe she didn't need to be moving then if she can't take care of it herself?)
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Bearlyhere
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« Reply #2164 on: February 27, 2012, 09:17:18 AM »

Bearly!  How are you and yours? 

Hanging in.  I have a bit of a cold and my Mom can't use the washer and dryer on her floor this week.  For some reason that means I have to go and do the wash there.  I sometimes do it anyway, but this week I have to.

 



Look after your cold. 
Does that mean you have to take the laundry to another floor and do it?

Yes.  My Mom has an elevator right outside her room, there is only 2 floors, the laundry room is across from the elevator on both floors, and she has an electric wheelchair and the wash fits on it upstairs where she is.   The floor is being tiled this week, Monday to Friday.  She didn't do the wash this weekend because she said my Dad was in a bad mood Saturday so she didn't visit him on Sunday and didn't take his wash either Saturday or Sunday (I have a feeling she did not see him on Saturday either).  He is in the medical part of the facility.  My Mom is a nurse and visits her friends no matter what mood they are in.  I don't like being taken advantage of, especially when I have my own doctor upset with the amount I have been doing for her.  She manages to do a lot of social activities and she volunteers for others, but not my Dad.

Sorry to complain, but I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.  She wants me to come every day and take the wash home with me, but there is no reason to do that.  I also have my Son and his appointments to go to and my eye doctor appointment.  My car got hit almost a month ago and I have not had time to take it to get fixed.

Rant over.

 



Prayers heading your way Bearly. an angelic monkey
I am going to add my rant to yours. Where is Bearly in all this ? If you don't take care of yourself you won't be able to take care of anyone else......time to put Bearly 1st for a bit.

Thanks 4Donks!  I see what you are saying and I totally agree, however, where does that leave my Dad who is totally helpless in all this?

 

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There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world.
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I believe in miracles!
Bearlyhere
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« Reply #2165 on: February 27, 2012, 09:21:05 AM »

For Bearly- you rant on, that is what we are here for.  I feel your pain of being in a rock and a hard place with your parents.  As for the laundry, is it really about you coming to do the laundry or is it she just wants to give someone directives?  I don't know in your situation but I have found often times it is not the task at hand but control of one another.

4donks is right- take care of yourself first.

We just found out that Mom is going to be moved from the memory care over to Assisted Living maybe this week. That is one of the first things she asked me was who was going to do her laundry.  (I wanted to say maybe she didn't need to be moving then if she can't take care of it herself?)

I hear you, I hope things get straightened out for you.  Thanks for permission to rant.  I know all about the control thing, unfortunately, my Dad was the one who helped my son and I with his autism, he went to therapy sessions with us and meetings and knew everyone working with him, and he is the one that would suffer in all of this.

 

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There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world.
Time spent with monkeys is never wasted. 
I believe in miracles!
cadillac
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« Reply #2166 on: February 27, 2012, 09:24:11 AM »

For Bearly- you rant on, that is what we are here for.  I feel your pain of being in a rock and a hard place with your parents.  As for the laundry, is it really about you coming to do the laundry or is it she just wants to give someone directives?  I don't know in your situation but I have found often times it is not the task at hand but control of one another.

4donks is right- take care of yourself first.

We just found out that Mom is going to be moved from the memory care over to Assisted Living maybe this week. That is one of the first things she asked me was who was going to do her laundry.  (I wanted to say maybe she didn't need to be moving then if she can't take care of it herself?)

I hear you, I hope things get straightened out for you.  Thanks for permission to rant.  I know all about the control thing, unfortunately, my Dad was the one who helped my son and I with his autism, he went to therapy sessions with us and meetings and knew everyone working with him, and he is the one that would suffer in all of this.

 


Oh my, be there for your Dad. Do what you can and don't look back. That is what me and my sis try to do.
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Bearlyhere
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« Reply #2167 on: February 27, 2012, 09:28:43 AM »

For Bearly- you rant on, that is what we are here for.  I feel your pain of being in a rock and a hard place with your parents.  As for the laundry, is it really about you coming to do the laundry or is it she just wants to give someone directives?  I don't know in your situation but I have found often times it is not the task at hand but control of one another.

4donks is right- take care of yourself first.

We just found out that Mom is going to be moved from the memory care over to Assisted Living maybe this week. That is one of the first things she asked me was who was going to do her laundry.  (I wanted to say maybe she didn't need to be moving then if she can't take care of it herself?)

I hear you, I hope things get straightened out for you.  Thanks for permission to rant.  I know all about the control thing, unfortunately, my Dad was the one who helped my son and I with his autism, he went to therapy sessions with us and meetings and knew everyone working with him, and he is the one that would suffer in all of this.

 


Oh my, be there for your Dad. Do what you can and don't look back. That is what me and my sis try to do.

Thanks, Cadi!

 an angelic monkey

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There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world.
Time spent with monkeys is never wasted. 
I believe in miracles!
can
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« Reply #2168 on: February 27, 2012, 09:46:59 AM »

Bearly!  How are you and yours? 

Hanging in.  I have a bit of a cold and my Mom can't use the washer and dryer on her floor this week.  For some reason that means I have to go and do the wash there.  I sometimes do it anyway, but this week I have to.

 



Look after your cold. 
Does that mean you have to take the laundry to another floor and do it?

Yes.  My Mom has an elevator right outside her room, there is only 2 floors, the laundry room is across from the elevator on both floors, and she has an electric wheelchair and the wash fits on it upstairs where she is.   The floor is being tiled this week, Monday to Friday.  She didn't do the wash this weekend because she said my Dad was in a bad mood Saturday so she didn't visit him on Sunday and didn't take his wash either Saturday or Sunday (I have a feeling she did not see him on Saturday either).  He is in the medical part of the facility.  My Mom is a nurse and visits her friends no matter what mood they are in.  I don't like being taken advantage of, especially when I have my own doctor upset with the amount I have been doing for her.  She manages to do a lot of social activities and she volunteers for others, but not my Dad.

Sorry to complain, but I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.  She wants me to come every day and take the wash home with me, but there is no reason to do that.  I also have my Son and his appointments to go to and my eye doctor appointment.  My car got hit almost a month ago and I have not had time to take it to get fixed.

Rant over.

 



Hey, ranting is not a bad thing every now and again.
My dear bearly, you try so hard to please.  Bless you!  an angelic monkey  It must hurt so much to do so much and feel you're being taking advantage of.   Please, please, do not allow yourself to be treated in this fashion.
You are not super human, though you are a super human being!
Listen to your doctor, apply your common sense. 
Sorry your Daddy seems to be taking a back seat. 
I know Bearly, it is easy for me to say.  I am not living it or feeling the deep emotions
around this family dilemma.
Is it possible for the facility to do your Dad's laundry?

Sorry I'm just getting back to you now . . . my computer froze when I was here earlier.
I had a little lie down and fell asleep.

Sorry to hear about your car.  Time to get it fixed and keep your eye appointment.

Does Cubby have lots of appointments on a regular basis?

In short, look after yourself and Cubby and do what you reasonably can for others.

  :

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can
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« Reply #2169 on: February 27, 2012, 09:50:00 AM »

Bearly!  How are you and yours? 

Hanging in.  I have a bit of a cold and my Mom can't use the washer and dryer on her floor this week.  For some reason that means I have to go and do the wash there.  I sometimes do it anyway, but this week I have to.

 



Look after your cold. 
Does that mean you have to take the laundry to another floor and do it?

Yes.  My Mom has an elevator right outside her room, there is only 2 floors, the laundry room is across from the elevator on both floors, and she has an electric wheelchair and the wash fits on it upstairs where she is.   The floor is being tiled this week, Monday to Friday.  She didn't do the wash this weekend because she said my Dad was in a bad mood Saturday so she didn't visit him on Sunday and didn't take his wash either Saturday or Sunday (I have a feeling she did not see him on Saturday either).  He is in the medical part of the facility.  My Mom is a nurse and visits her friends no matter what mood they are in.  I don't like being taken advantage of, especially when I have my own doctor upset with the amount I have been doing for her.  She manages to do a lot of social activities and she volunteers for others, but not my Dad.

Sorry to complain, but I feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place.  She wants me to come every day and take the wash home with me, but there is no reason to do that.  I also have my Son and his appointments to go to and my eye doctor appointment.  My car got hit almost a month ago and I have not had time to take it to get fixed.

Rant over.

 



Prayers heading your way Bearly. an angelic monkey
I am going to add my rant to yours. Where is Bearly in all this ? If you don't take care of yourself you won't be able to take care of anyone else......time to put Bearly 1st for a bit.

 
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can
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« Reply #2170 on: February 27, 2012, 09:56:48 AM »

For Bearly- you rant on, that is what we are here for.  I feel your pain of being in a rock and a hard place with your parents.  As for the laundry, is it really about you coming to do the laundry or is it she just wants to give someone directives?  I don't know in your situation but I have found often times it is not the task at hand but control of one another.

4donks is right- take care of yourself first.

We just found out that Mom is going to be moved from the memory care over to Assisted Living maybe this week. That is one of the first things she asked me was who was going to do her laundry.  (I wanted to say maybe she didn't need to be moving then if she can't take care of it herself?)

Good point Cadi!

What is memory care?  Hear what you wanted to say, but what did you say?
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« Reply #2171 on: February 27, 2012, 10:06:19 AM »

Prayers for my monkey friends.
Need prayers for George, my ex, who I take care of -- he just had a seizure and is being taken to the hospital.  He has a long history of them -- just need my monkey prayers.
Blessings.
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« Reply #2172 on: February 27, 2012, 10:09:41 AM »

Prayers for my monkey friends.
Need prayers for George, my ex, who I take care of -- he just had a seizure and is being taken to the hospital.  He has a long history of them -- just need my monkey prayers.
Blessings.

Good morning Monkeys--Sister,George has my prayers for his swift recovery.  Please let us know his progress as you know it.
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« Reply #2173 on: February 27, 2012, 10:11:44 AM »



Good Morning Can!  How is everything?  How is your brother and all of your family?

Good Morning Monkeys!   

 
Thanks for asking Bearly. 
Spent the day with Mom on Friday.  She has an appointment with the doctor today to request he send the recommendation for her husbands long term care.
She has gone from not being ready to put him in long term care yet, to being prepared to have it happen sooner rather than later.  So, I'm happy to see my Mom feeling more comfortable about it.  We keep reassuring her she has done all that she can and more than most would be willing or capable of.  The fact that his son supports her decision has helped I think.

My brother has had his second treatment.  Not sure how that went, will know today.

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« Reply #2174 on: February 27, 2012, 10:14:13 AM »

Prayers for my monkey friends.
Need prayers for George, my ex, who I take care of -- he just had a seizure and is being taken to the hospital.  He has a long history of them -- just need my monkey prayers.
Blessings.

 an angelic monkey
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« Reply #2175 on: February 27, 2012, 10:30:39 AM »

Here you go JSM.......wild cherry

YAY!!!!  We can make cherry wine!!!!   

or cherry pie - ba do ba, cherry ba do ba cherry pie....oh sooooo gooooood!

Gosh, folks.  I hate to be the one to tell you but there will be no cherry pie from this tree.  It is a redbud tree, often called a Judas tree in some parts of the country.  It is unusual in that the blooms come directly from the trunks with no branches of their own and the seed pods, which look something like mimosa pods also come directly from the trunk.  The birds make a big mess with wild cherry trees.I have about 20 on my property, therefore a big mess.  Wild cherry trees also attract tent caterpillers and they are difficult to eradicate. Redbud trees grow wild in my part of the country and there are many at the lower levels of the Smokies which are beautiful when in bloom. 

Eastern Redbud:  http://aolsearcht11.search.aol.com/aol/image?q=Redbud+trees&v_t=wscreen50-bb

Wild Cherry:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prunus_avium

I just noticed yesterday that the nodules on the red bud trees in my yard are starting to swell and it will be a big show when they bloom.  They are truly beautiful.
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Brandi is making sure I get around!


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« Reply #2176 on: February 27, 2012, 10:41:08 AM »

For Bearly- you rant on, that is what we are here for.  I feel your pain of being in a rock and a hard place with your parents.  As for the laundry, is it really about you coming to do the laundry or is it she just wants to give someone directives?  I don't know in your situation but I have found often times it is not the task at hand but control of one another.

4donks is right- take care of yourself first.

We just found out that Mom is going to be moved from the memory care over to Assisted Living maybe this week. That is one of the first things she asked me was who was going to do her laundry.  (I wanted to say maybe she didn't need to be moving then if she can't take care of it herself?)


I hear you, I hope things get straightened out for you.  Thanks for permission to rant.  I know all about the control thing, unfortunately, my Dad was the one who helped my son and I with his autism, he went to therapy sessions with us and meetings and knew everyone working with him, and he is the one that would suffer in all of this.

 



Does the facility offer laundry services? I know it would cost money but better that then either he be neglected or you be worn to a frazzle!
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theboyzmom
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Brandi is making sure I get around!


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« Reply #2177 on: February 27, 2012, 10:46:07 AM »

For Bearly- you rant on, that is what we are here for.  I feel your pain of being in a rock and a hard place with your parents.  As for the laundry, is it really about you coming to do the laundry or is it she just wants to give someone directives?  I don't know in your situation but I have found often times it is not the task at hand but control of one another.

4donks is right- take care of yourself first.

We just found out that Mom is going to be moved from the memory care over to Assisted Living maybe this week. That is one of the first things she asked me was who was going to do her laundry.  (I wanted to say maybe she didn't need to be moving then if she can't take care of it herself?)

Good point Cadi!

What is memory care?  Hear what you wanted to say, but what did you say?


I am not Bearly but memory care is specialized care for people with various stages of Alzheimer. They work hard to keep the people up to the most potential in memory areas that they can be at. They also are specialized in dealing with the symptoms of Alzheimer - the paranoia, need to go do "something" and the reversion to previous habits. For example, my mother in laws facility has a "nursery" with dolls and all the equipment so they can be mothers again. Also they have a full kitchen (with the stove locked out so they can not really turn it on!) so the women can "cook" dinner for their families. Often people with Alzheimer go back in time and want to do what they did as younger people. My mother in law is forever taking care of the "kids" - her youngest is almost 50! but it gives them comfort. They often know in an emotional way that something is wrong but they do not know what it is - so they revert to comfortable habits.
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We can never be sure that the opinion we are endeavoring to stifle is a false opinion; and if we were sure, stifling it would be an evil still. - John Stuart Mill On Liberty, 1859
- George Bernard Shaw
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« Reply #2178 on: February 27, 2012, 11:56:34 AM »

Anyone have an apple computer?  I just got one and it is a bit intimidating and overwhelming.....yikes!

I find they aren't so different from a Windows computer just some things in different places.  Whenever I want to figure out how to use anything, I look for a Youtube on it.  There are instructional Youtubes for everything!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=147oZh3mMMo

thanks ,,I will do that..
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« Reply #2179 on: February 27, 2012, 12:12:22 PM »

For Bearly- you rant on, that is what we are here for.  I feel your pain of being in a rock and a hard place with your parents.  As for the laundry, is it really about you coming to do the laundry or is it she just wants to give someone directives?  I don't know in your situation but I have found often times it is not the task at hand but control of one another.

4donks is right- take care of yourself first.

We just found out that Mom is going to be moved from the memory care over to Assisted Living maybe this week. That is one of the first things she asked me was who was going to do her laundry.  (I wanted to say maybe she didn't need to be moving then if she can't take care of it herself?)

Good point Cadi!

What is memory care?  Hear what you wanted to say, but what did you say?


I am not Bearly but memory care is specialized care for people with various stages of Alzheimer. They work hard to keep the people up to the most potential in memory areas that they can be at. They also are specialized in dealing with the symptoms of Alzheimer - the paranoia, need to go do "something" and the reversion to previous habits. For example, my mother in laws facility has a "nursery" with dolls and all the equipment so they can be mothers again. Also they have a full kitchen (with the stove locked out so they can not really turn it on!) so the women can "cook" dinner for their families. Often people with Alzheimer go back in time and want to do what they did as younger people. My mother in law is forever taking care of the "kids" - her youngest is almost 50! but it gives them comfort. They often know in an emotional way that something is wrong but they do not know what it is - so they revert to comfortable habits.

Boyzmom--Thank you for this information. I am the Conservator for my sister-in-law who is in a nursing home.  She has not yet exhibited the behaviour which you describe, just severe short-term memory loss and has lost the ability to walk.  She is wheelchair bound.  I never know what to expect each time I visit her.  The information you posted is most helpful.  Thanks again.
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Wrong is wrong, even if everybody does it.
Right is right, even if nobody does it. ~ Unknown
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