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Author Topic: PRAYER REQUESTS - Please list here  (Read 1652863 times)
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joesamas mama
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Patton is my babe. RIP my Josef I love you both!


« Reply #3400 on: June 20, 2009, 06:26:07 PM »

I have a friend who said she is watching me. She said her parents are alive, so she has been untouched by the death of a loved one. She sees the pain her friends are in when they have to deal with this issue. So I wrote her the following email. I hope it will help one of you.

If I had to tell you one thing, it would be to spend as much time with them as possible. Call them, email them, send them cards and notes through the mail. They really treasure communication the most in their twilight years. I have found unopened gifts and such through out the house. We thought we were bringing him into the Millennium with technology. He cared nothing for that, but he had every letter and card we sent him.

Ask questions about their life, I am shocked at the things we are finding out about my Dad. He was involved in so many projects from Kiwanis club to the Lakeshore School Educational fund. I want to hear his voice, he wasn't much for the camera but I'm going to have to ask my sisters for video. Take video and have them answer questions and recall their youth. It may be years after their passing for you to view it, but you will have it and you will be able to visit with them once again.

Call them constantly, check up on them. If only under the guise of you seeing what book they are reading or a simple question. At least you can go to sleep knowing they are OK at the moment. I wish I had gotten my father that Life Alert thing I saw on TV. He died alone, I have no idea if he suffered or if it was quick, the phone was in his kitchen and he hated his cell phone.

Have them get all their paperwork together in one file, my Dad did this and it was a blessing. If possible discuss what they want for their funeral. We all think about it, I have even mentioned to my daughter things I would like. Most children don't want to discuss it, it's too painful, but you have to know what they want, it will make things easier when the time comes. They don't want to leave you with difficult decisions, they want their affairs in order. No one wants their children to struggle with their issues and finances. Have them put your name on their accounts and a quick deed for the house. Life will be so much easier. Funerals are fricking expensive, so far it's close to $9,0000. Those pre-paid funerals aren't a bad idea. Dad kicked this around a few years ago, but decided to leave the money in the bank so it would gain additional interest. It's so hard to think straight making these decisions. Writing obits, writing a eulogy, trying to remember what year he was in the service or when he was Superintendent of Lakeshore Schools. So much to do in the space of a few days. Funerals are only 2 days now, things have changed.

Help them clean their home. It's difficult in the later years to bend over, catch that dust bunny, get rid of that stack of newspapers in the corner. As a present hire a crew to clean from top to bottom. Yeah they may bitch and complain, but man, nothing makes you feel better than a clean home, it gives you a sense of control again. Pay a lawn service to do all the outside stuff from lawn to bushes. It helps so much.

Sit with them and watch a movie or TV. My Dad had a list written of all these old movies he wanted to see. I love old movies and have seen quite a few on his list, I would have loved to watch them with him, but he never said a word. I always thought he was watching the news or golfing. Just bring over a munchie or dessert, kick back and hang with them. These are moments you will treasure forever.
OMG Boo, you are making me feel so guilty about not spending enough time with my Daddy who lives out of town. Not too far, but a long drive in my car that will probably not make it there and back. If they are going to be in their town tomorrow, I think I will go to Mass at 8 am, drive down to see him then come back and get back in time to have lunch at my mom's with my stepdad.

What you said about watch an old movie with them, etc. It reminds me of when I would spend Memorial Day with my Grandmother watching war movies, she would break out the photo album she had of my Grandads. I remember breaking a date with a guy so I could go to her house so she wasn't alone.

Boo, I love you. Please take care. My heart is truly breaking for you. I can't type now through the tears. JSM

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« Reply #3401 on: June 20, 2009, 07:30:24 PM »

Boo - you are so right. My sister had time off from school during the last summer my grand parents were alive. She spent the summer recording their life stories and after they and my dad passed away she made everyone in the family a book of the transcripts. It is so cool to read and I can hear their voices telling the stories. I do wish I had spent more time with my dad but the doctors said he had about 6 months so I figured I had a lot of time - 6 weeks later he was gone and with it my chance to just hang out with him. it is one of the great regrets of my life.
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« Reply #3402 on: June 20, 2009, 07:52:53 PM »

I have a friend who said she is watching me. She said her parents are alive, so she has been untouched by the death of a loved one. She sees the pain her friends are in when they have to deal with this issue. So I wrote her the following email. I hope it will help one of you.

If I had to tell you one thing, it would be to spend as much time with them as possible. Call them, email them, send them cards and notes through the mail. They really treasure communication the most in their twilight years. I have found unopened gifts and such through out the house. We thought we were bringing him into the Millennium with technology. He cared nothing for that, but he had every letter and card we sent him.

Ask questions about their life, I am shocked at the things we are finding out about my Dad. He was involved in so many projects from Kiwanis club to the Lakeshore School Educational fund. I want to hear his voice, he wasn't much for the camera but I'm going to have to ask my sisters for video. Take video and have them answer questions and recall their youth. It may be years after their passing for you to view it, but you will have it and you will be able to visit with them once again.

Call them constantly, check up on them. If only under the guise of you seeing what book they are reading or a simple question. At least you can go to sleep knowing they are OK at the moment. I wish I had gotten my father that Life Alert thing I saw on TV. He died alone, I have no idea if he suffered or if it was quick, the phone was in his kitchen and he hated his cell phone.

Have them get all their paperwork together in one file, my Dad did this and it was a blessing. If possible discuss what they want for their funeral. We all think about it, I have even mentioned to my daughter things I would like. Most children don't want to discuss it, it's too painful, but you have to know what they want, it will make things easier when the time comes. They don't want to leave you with difficult decisions, they want their affairs in order. No one wants their children to struggle with their issues and finances. Have them put your name on their accounts and a quick deed for the house. Life will be so much easier. Funerals are fricking expensive, so far it's close to $9,0000. Those pre-paid funerals aren't a bad idea. Dad kicked this around a few years ago, but decided to leave the money in the bank so it would gain additional interest. It's so hard to think straight making these decisions. Writing obits, writing a eulogy, trying to remember what year he was in the service or when he was Superintendent of Lakeshore Schools. So much to do in the space of a few days. Funerals are only 2 days now, things have changed.

Help them clean their home. It's difficult in the later years to bend over, catch that dust bunny, get rid of that stack of newspapers in the corner. As a present hire a crew to clean from top to bottom. Yeah they may bitch and complain, but man, nothing makes you feel better than a clean home, it gives you a sense of control again. Pay a lawn service to do all the outside stuff from lawn to bushes. It helps so much.

Sit with them and watch a movie or TV. My Dad had a list written of all these old movies he wanted to see. I love old movies and have seen quite a few on his list, I would have loved to watch them with him, but he never said a word. I always thought he was watching the news or golfing. Just bring over a munchie or dessert, kick back and hang with them. These are moments you will treasure forever.
Boo I am so sorry you have lost your dear Dad. 
How wonderful of you to think of others at this time by passing along the above suggestions.  I am sure many of us will pay heed.  I know I will.  Thank you. 
May you find comfort in the sweet memories of your Dad and the love of your caring family and friends.  Hugs to your good daughter and many hugs to you.
With sincere condolences,
can.    

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« Reply #3403 on: June 20, 2009, 07:56:05 PM »

Island Monkey -
You, your daughter, and all your family are in my thoughts daily. 
God bless.
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« Reply #3404 on: June 20, 2009, 08:07:32 PM »

Boo, your post is so true. My parents and both my sisters are gone now. I understood what you said about feeling like an orphan. That is just how I felt when my mama died. And then last year my only living sister died. Your post is so right on.

My heart is hurting right along with yours. It will get better, Boo. This is the worst thing that can happen in a person's life, to loose a loved one, especially a daddy. Just keep putting one step before the other and you will get through this. We are here. I am glad you are leaving your heart open and not closing yourself in. We all feel so helpless to make this easier for you. I pray daily for you and your family.   an angelic monkey
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« Reply #3405 on: June 20, 2009, 09:10:54 PM »

Boo,I just wanted you to know I was thinking about you.  an angelic monkey
That was a good post with a lot of god ideas.
Thankfully my parents have all their paperwork and such in order.It's the stories and things they like to do that interest me the most.
I have a folder with stories about them and my son.Little grandson doesn't remember his dad too much like sister does.This gives them something to refer to.
I have stories about pets,favorite things to do etc.Basically it's a combination of the whole family.I like to include favorite recipes.I take pictures of the kids baking.
I'm making sure I have handwritten stories that I as well as my son wrote.Those will be treasured some day.
I only mention all of this because you have inspired me to start working on this again.I quit for a long while.Thank you so much.Hugs to you.    an angelic monkey
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joesamas mama
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« Reply #3406 on: June 20, 2009, 10:56:40 PM »

Boo, thank you for your advice. I just tracked down my Daddy. Something is wrong with him and no one has ever told me this, He tried keeping it a secret. I dont' know what is wrong, but I will find out next weekend. He has been seeing an oncologist and my best friend (cancer survivor) are going to have  a little chitty chat with him on Sunday. Thanks Boo and remember JSM is here for you.  an angelic monkey
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« Reply #3407 on: June 21, 2009, 04:30:38 AM »

Deenie I am so sorry about your father.  When my father passed I cried for almost a week straight, night and day.  My mom was so worried about me as I could not stop crying.  Then one night I had a dream.  I saw my father very peaceful in a beautiful orchard with fields rolling forever behind him.  He told me that he was ok, he was not in pain anymore and that he loved me.  He told me he was at peace and this would be the last time he was coming to see me until we reunited.  He told me to love his grandchildren and that he would be there for them especially his grand daughter who he had waited forever for.  I had the most peaceful feeling come over me it was amazing.  I awoke and was still wrapped in that peace.  I knew then that he was fine and that we would see each other again.  My father passed 3 weeks after my daughter was born.  He wanted a granddaughter so bad that when I was pregnant with my second son he was so sure that it was going to be a girl he had already started buying girlie girl dresses and beautiful dolls. There is 10 years between my second son and my daughter.  My father had a stroke shortly after I became pregnant with my daughter.  When she was about a week old I took her to see my dad, placed her in his arms in his wheel chair and he wept.  He had had several strokes by then and we were not sure how much he could even understand.  When I saw him holding my daughter and crying I knew though his body had failed him his mind was trapped.  That was the first time I had ever seen my father cry.  My father loved gardening and the outdoors.  As my daughter was growing up she would be fascinated by bugs and flowers and come in and tell us about them.  When either my mom or myself would ask her where she learned that she would always say Papa.  It sent chills into my mom and I but we soon realized that he was holding her hand and sharing his love of gardening with her.  She told us things that there was no way she would have known or got from watching TV.  It has been 12 years since my father has passed and I am sitting here weeping sharing this with you.  What I am trying to say is that I know that your Dad will always be around you, will be proud of you, will be there to hold you and guide you even though you can not see him.  My heartfelt condolences and prayers go out to you.


Northern Rose
Your Words have touched me so deeply. Today I thought I was Ok .. hmm.
No. It has not yet sunk in. I feel I am ok for a moment. Then it hits me over again.
I try to grasp it. I am so without words. I am caught now within family and paper work and he said/she said .. keeping my mind spilling. Yet in the quiet moments I find my heart so scared and in a place that it has never ventured ever before in my life.  I never ever thought I would be without my Dad.  Whenever I was struggling ( not monetary) but for answers, for aid, for someone to come to my rescue - My Dad was that only person. No matter what - he always came and fixed it. Made it better. Made it right. Now I struggle and I find a empty empty hole that no one can fill. No one has ever in my life taken care of me as my Dad did. For now all I can do is take one step at a time.
I worry of my Sister Boo. She now is within my path ...we walk the same path - yet share two separate pasts, journeys .. there is no words to put it into prospective.
If she and I could try to speak of of our hearts as we are now - It would be rendered speechless ..because I think she and I share the same for now ..
We are both rendered at that same time losing our Fathers without warning ..Both our Dads left our lives within One day .. and No one can be prepared, nor can anyone recover. Words cannot describe all the feelings that rush into my head.
I so remember fondly when I was a little girl. My Dad always wore beautiful suits. He wore suits that made him look like Ricky Ricardo. They were not typical suits. He always shined his shoes with polish... I used to watch him take care of his shoes. He would come home after work and he would play Music * Music was huge in our house* and he would take me by my hands and say Dance with me.

I would stand on his shoes with my little bare feet and he would hold my hands .. and he would Dance and I would laugh and giggle - because my entire body would go UP and round and down and UP .. as he would SING the music to me..
First thing he would say as he came through the front door when I was little ..was Where's my Sweet Baby ..after he found my Mom. I was always there waiting for him to come home. My Dad always smelled like fresh cut limes or citrus his cologne.

When my Mom was not watching I used to go into my Dads closet and take one of his ties and put it around neck and put on his shoes and stand in front of his closet mirror .. and SMILE like the SUN ... puff my chest out and make faces into the Mirror .. and think to myself .. ONE Day I am going to be just like my Dad. Which meant fearless, strong, funny and kind.

My Dad would take me to the drug store and allow me to stand for 15 mins to pick out a comic book even when he knew I was not old enough to read. He never rushed me, He loved books.  He would do anything for me -even today. He was my Daddy. He will always be My Daddy. I so miss him.
Northern thank you.


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« Reply #3408 on: June 21, 2009, 09:06:14 AM »

Boo:  Thank you for the heartfelt post.  How true your words are.  There have been times in my life that I have been way too frank with my mother and father.  There was a time right after college that my father and I were not speaking to each other and he had heart surgery.  Late the night after the surgery he had another heart attack and insisted that the nurse call me so that he could say he was sorry and that he loved me.  I vowed then to just love my parents and any conflict needed to stop regardless of whether we agree or not.  My father passed more than a year ago and I have no regrets.  I was the last one he saw the last one he talked to and my last memory of him was him in a wheelchair with me behind running and racing his 3 year old granddaughter down the hall of the hospital.  Sheer delight was on his face and I think just temporarily he forgot that he could not use his legs. 

Boo and Deenie -- I am praying for both of you and share your pain of missing my daddy today.  Yours, however, is fresh and deep and I pray that God, our Father, comforts you today and that wonderful memories fill you up.

Love, Pooks
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« Reply #3409 on: June 21, 2009, 10:07:06 AM »

Hi Boo - your post is so true, so so true. Your father must be very proud of you, he raised a very caring and loving daughter, friend, mother and monkey. You are in my thoughts and prayers.........I am sending you lots of hugs today.

 an angelic monkey
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« Reply #3410 on: June 21, 2009, 10:18:25 AM »

Deenie you have such fond memories of your dad.....they will be forever yours, they will never fade.  By the sounds of it your father was a gentle giant so loving yet protective of his love for family.  Thank you for sharing some of your memories I enjoyed the memory of going to the drugstore and the comic book.....I had some of the same experiences, reading that brought a smile, even though I know your heart aches your dad will forever live in your heart and soul.  Hugs to you.  an angelic monkey
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« Reply #3411 on: June 21, 2009, 10:24:57 AM »

Boo:  Thank you for the heartfelt post.  How true your words are.  There have been times in my life that I have been way too frank with my mother and father.  There was a time right after college that my father and I were not speaking to each other and he had heart surgery.  Late the night after the surgery he had another heart attack and insisted that the nurse call me so that he could say he was sorry and that he loved me.  I vowed then to just love my parents and any conflict needed to stop regardless of whether we agree or not.  My father passed more than a year ago and I have no regrets.  I was the last one he saw the last one he talked to and my last memory of him was him in a wheelchair with me behind running and racing his 3 year old granddaughter down the hall of the hospital.  Sheer delight was on his face and I think just temporarily he forgot that he could not use his legs. 

Boo and Deenie -- I am praying for both of you and share your pain of missing my daddy today.  Yours, however, is fresh and deep and I pray that God, our Father, comforts you today and that wonderful memories fill you up.

Love, Pooks

How exceptionally beautiful Pookie, I highlighted the part that brought a smile to my face. Thank you for sharing that. You done good by your Daddy, I'm sure he's smiling down on you with that memory.
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« Reply #3412 on: June 21, 2009, 10:29:45 AM »

Northern Rose
Your Words have touched me so deeply. Today I thought I was Ok .. hmm.
No. It has not yet sunk in. I feel I am ok for a moment. Then it hits me over again.
I try to grasp it. I am so without words. I am caught now within family and paper work and he said/she said .. keeping my mind spilling. Yet in the quiet moments I find my heart so scared and in a place that it has never ventured ever before in my life.  I never ever thought I would be without my Dad.  Whenever I was struggling ( not monetary) but for answers, for aid, for someone to come to my rescue - My Dad was that only person. No matter what - he always came and fixed it. Made it better. Made it right. Now I struggle and I find a empty empty hole that no one can fill. No one has ever in my life taken care of me as my Dad did. For now all I can do is take one step at a time.
I worry of my Sister Boo. She now is within my path ...we walk the same path - yet share two separate pasts, journeys .. there is no words to put it into prospective.
If she and I could try to speak of of our hearts as we are now - It would be rendered speechless ..because I think she and I share the same for now ..
We are both rendered at that same time losing our Fathers without warning ..Both our Dads left our lives within One day .. and No one can be prepared, nor can anyone recover. Words cannot describe all the feelings that rush into my head.
I so remember fondly when I was a little girl. My Dad always wore beautiful suits. He wore suits that made him look like Ricky Ricardo. They were not typical suits. He always shined his shoes with polish... I used to watch him take care of his shoes. He would come home after work and he would play Music * Music was huge in our house* and he would take me by my hands and say Dance with me.

I would stand on his shoes with my little bare feet and he would hold my hands .. and he would Dance and I would laugh and giggle - because my entire body would go UP and round and down and UP .. as he would SING the music to me..
First thing he would say as he came through the front door when I was little ..was Where's my Sweet Baby ..after he found my Mom. I was always there waiting for him to come home. My Dad always smelled like fresh cut limes or citrus his cologne.

When my Mom was not watching I used to go into my Dads closet and take one of his ties and put it around neck and put on his shoes and stand in front of his closet mirror .. and SMILE like the SUN ... puff my chest out and make faces into the Mirror .. and think to myself .. ONE Day I am going to be just like my Dad. Which meant fearless, strong, funny and kind.

My Dad would take me to the drug store and allow me to stand for 15 mins to pick out a comic book even when he knew I was not old enough to read. He never rushed me, He loved books.  He would do anything for me -even today. He was my Daddy. He will always be My Daddy. I so miss him.
Northern thank you.




Deenie, you have the best gift of all, such beautiful memories. No matter how the vultures circle they cannot take away the best your Daddy had to give, his memories with you. Some people are all about the money, not caring of the person that passed or the devastation of the loved ones who were closest. But you trudged on, taking care of business and doing the next right thing, even through your pain. You are such a strong woman, your Daddy would be proud!!!! 
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« Reply #3413 on: June 21, 2009, 12:46:32 PM »

Boo, Dennie, IM and all monkeys that are suffering a loss, my thoughts & prayers are with you.

I know from personal experience how hard days like today can be.  But I hope the sweet memories will lift you up and get you through.

Boo, when you described the feeling of being orphaned, I could relate to that.  The year 2000 was the worst year of my life.  I spent the first 6 months of that year caring for my parents (in another state).  My Mother died that June of lung cancer.  I brought my Father, at his request, to Florida to live near me.  He died the day after Christmas that same year.  As my sister was killed in an auto accident many years prior, I had no immediate family to help with the grief or the decisions.  I also went through a divorce that same year after 28 years of marriage.  So I can relate to your feeling of being orphaned.  And I feel your pain.

Your advice to all is so true and so very well said. 

May God bless you with peace in your time of need.
Love, cece
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« Reply #3414 on: June 21, 2009, 12:52:24 PM »


For all those in need and pain.
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« Reply #3415 on: June 21, 2009, 09:55:45 PM »

Prayers to all monkeys in need.  an angelic monkey
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« Reply #3416 on: June 22, 2009, 12:28:57 PM »

Good morning Boo and Deenie -- I know yesterday was especially hard for you and I had you on my mind and in my prayers all day. 

Love,
Pooks

PS -- All other Monkeys in need, I pray you each feel God's comforting arms today.
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« Reply #3417 on: June 22, 2009, 02:12:49 PM »

I have a friend who said she is watching me. She said her parents are alive, so she has been untouched by the death of a loved one. She sees the pain her friends are in when they have to deal with this issue. So I wrote her the following email. I hope it will help one of you.

If I had to tell you one thing, it would be to spend as much time with them as possible. Call them, email them, send them cards and notes through the mail. They really treasure communication the most in their twilight years. I have found unopened gifts and such through out the house. We thought we were bringing him into the Millennium with technology. He cared nothing for that, but he had every letter and card we sent him.

Ask questions about their life, I am shocked at the things we are finding out about my Dad. He was involved in so many projects from Kiwanis club to the Lakeshore School Educational fund. I want to hear his voice, he wasn't much for the camera but I'm going to have to ask my sisters for video. Take video and have them answer questions and recall their youth. It may be years after their passing for you to view it, but you will have it and you will be able to visit with them once again.

Call them constantly, check up on them. If only under the guise of you seeing what book they are reading or a simple question. At least you can go to sleep knowing they are OK at the moment. I wish I had gotten my father that Life Alert thing I saw on TV. He died alone, I have no idea if he suffered or if it was quick, the phone was in his kitchen and he hated his cell phone.

Have them get all their paperwork together in one file, my Dad did this and it was a blessing. If possible discuss what they want for their funeral. We all think about it, I have even mentioned to my daughter things I would like. Most children don't want to discuss it, it's too painful, but you have to know what they want, it will make things easier when the time comes. They don't want to leave you with difficult decisions, they want their affairs in order. No one wants their children to struggle with their issues and finances. Have them put your name on their accounts and a quick deed for the house. Life will be so much easier. Funerals are fricking expensive, so far it's close to $9,0000. Those pre-paid funerals aren't a bad idea. Dad kicked this around a few years ago, but decided to leave the money in the bank so it would gain additional interest. It's so hard to think straight making these decisions. Writing obits, writing a eulogy, trying to remember what year he was in the service or when he was Superintendent of Lakeshore Schools. So much to do in the space of a few days. Funerals are only 2 days now, things have changed.

Help them clean their home. It's difficult in the later years to bend over, catch that dust bunny, get rid of that stack of newspapers in the corner. As a present hire a crew to clean from top to bottom. Yeah they may bitch and complain, but man, nothing makes you feel better than a clean home, it gives you a sense of control again. Pay a lawn service to do all the outside stuff from lawn to bushes. It helps so much.

Sit with them and watch a movie or TV. My Dad had a list written of all these old movies he wanted to see. I love old movies and have seen quite a few on his list, I would have loved to watch them with him, but he never said a word. I always thought he was watching the news or golfing. Just bring over a munchie or dessert, kick back and hang with them. These are moments you will treasure forever.


Boo, I am a new Monkey but have been reading here a long time, so I have enjoyed your wit, insight, compassion, etc.  You have my prayers and admiration, especially after reading this post of yours.  What a heart and insight you have.  As many others here , I too have lost my hero, my father, over 2 years ago.  I am so blessed to say that we did do most of the things your mentioned in your email, (we also live in same town, so helps greatly).  As he had Alzheimers, even when my father didn't recognize me any more or remember many of his stories (or at least wasn't able to articulate them so one could understand), I cherish the videos we have of him because his heart and wit somehow still showed through.  Before the disease struck him, he had even written a book about his large family and their roots, devoting a chapter to each sibling, parent, grandparent, etc.  So I am lucky that so much of him shines through and we have written stories, history, etc.  As many others have told you, it will get better with time but that song, that favorite dish of his, that movie/book he loved, will give you that ache, but you will survive!!  All the better, for having loved and been loved.
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Madre
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« Reply #3418 on: June 22, 2009, 02:27:40 PM »

Deenie I am so sorry about your father.  When my father passed I cried for almost a week straight, night and day.  My mom was so worried about me as I could not stop crying.  Then one night I had a dream.  I saw my father very peaceful in a beautiful orchard with fields rolling forever behind him.  He told me that he was ok, he was not in pain anymore and that he loved me.  He told me he was at peace and this would be the last time he was coming to see me until we reunited.  He told me to love his grandchildren and that he would be there for them especially his grand daughter who he had waited forever for.  I had the most peaceful feeling come over me it was amazing.  I awoke and was still wrapped in that peace.  I knew then that he was fine and that we would see each other again.  My father passed 3 weeks after my daughter was born.  He wanted a granddaughter so bad that when I was pregnant with my second son he was so sure that it was going to be a girl he had already started buying girlie girl dresses and beautiful dolls. There is 10 years between my second son and my daughter.  My father had a stroke shortly after I became pregnant with my daughter.  When she was about a week old I took her to see my dad, placed her in his arms in his wheel chair and he wept.  He had had several strokes by then and we were not sure how much he could even understand.  When I saw him holding my daughter and crying I knew though his body had failed him his mind was trapped.  That was the first time I had ever seen my father cry.  My father loved gardening and the outdoors.  As my daughter was growing up she would be fascinated by bugs and flowers and come in and tell us about them.  When either my mom or myself would ask her where she learned that she would always say Papa.  It sent chills into my mom and I but we soon realized that he was holding her hand and sharing his love of gardening with her.  She told us things that there was no way she would have known or got from watching TV.  It has been 12 years since my father has passed and I am sitting here weeping sharing this with you.  What I am trying to say is that I know that your Dad will always be around you, will be proud of you, will be there to hold you and guide you even though you can not see him.  My heartfelt condolences and prayers go out to you.



Northern Rose, that is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read.  I too lost my beloved dad about two years ago and he also had a most special relationship with my daughter.  They were each others greatest fans!  Anyway, I appreciate your words of comfort to Boo and am weeping too.
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Madre
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« Reply #3419 on: June 22, 2009, 02:42:47 PM »

Northern Rose
Your Words have touched me so deeply. Today I thought I was Ok .. hmm.
No. It has not yet sunk in. I feel I am ok for a moment. Then it hits me over again.
I try to grasp it. I am so without words. I am caught now within family and paper work and he said/she said .. keeping my mind spilling. Yet in the quiet moments I find my heart so scared and in a place that it has never ventured ever before in my life.  I never ever thought I would be without my Dad.  Whenever I was struggling ( not monetary) but for answers, for aid, for someone to come to my rescue - My Dad was that only person. No matter what - he always came and fixed it. Made it better. Made it right. Now I struggle and I find a empty empty hole that no one can fill. No one has ever in my life taken care of me as my Dad did. For now all I can do is take one step at a time.
I worry of my Sister Boo. She now is within my path ...we walk the same path - yet share two separate pasts, journeys .. there is no words to put it into prospective.
If she and I could try to speak of of our hearts as we are now - It would be rendered speechless ..because I think she and I share the same for now ..
We are both rendered at that same time losing our Fathers without warning ..Both our Dads left our lives within One day .. and No one can be prepared, nor can anyone recover. Words cannot describe all the feelings that rush into my head.
I so remember fondly when I was a little girl. My Dad always wore beautiful suits. He wore suits that made him look like Ricky Ricardo. They were not typical suits. He always shined his shoes with polish... I used to watch him take care of his shoes. He would come home after work and he would play Music * Music was huge in our house* and he would take me by my hands and say Dance with me.

I would stand on his shoes with my little bare feet and he would hold my hands .. and he would Dance and I would laugh and giggle - because my entire body would go UP and round and down and UP .. as he would SING the music to me..
First thing he would say as he came through the front door when I was little ..was Where's my Sweet Baby ..after he found my Mom. I was always there waiting for him to come home. My Dad always smelled like fresh cut limes or citrus his cologne.

When my Mom was not watching I used to go into my Dads closet and take one of his ties and put it around neck and put on his shoes and stand in front of his closet mirror .. and SMILE like the SUN ... puff my chest out and make faces into the Mirror .. and think to myself .. ONE Day I am going to be just like my Dad. Which meant fearless, strong, funny and kind.

My Dad would take me to the drug store and allow me to stand for 15 mins to pick out a comic book even when he knew I was not old enough to read. He never rushed me, He loved books.  He would do anything for me -even today. He was my Daddy. He will always be My Daddy. I so miss him.
Northern thank you.



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My prayers are  with you Deenie.  What wonderful stories you shared, many of which I can relate to.  I understand.
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