Caylee Marie Anthony, 2, FL Missing since June 16-just reported by mother #82

[islandmonkey]

I just wanted to remind everyone because the anniversary of a special childs death is coming up..............................................If you know of anyone who might have a Ferret in their home and also a child, tell them this is very dangerous.......some people dont know that a ferret is a danger to young children and I try to warn people often.....

Thanks for the heads up~is it germ related or something else???

[janetruth]

I never told.  There was only the one instance, but the guy pursued me somewhat.  He was an acquaintance of my parents, and worked at the school I attended.  It never occurred to me to tell my parents.  I just did my best to avoid the guy, and was never alone with him again.

So, girls don't tell, either.  I don't know if it was due to embarrassment, or my upbringing, which emphasized doing what I was told.

OHHHHHHH JaneTruth, I am so sorry to here you had to endure this also It breaks my heart to hear just how many victims are out there  God bless you for what you went thru.

You know what, Islandmonkey?  I'm willing to bet that 30% to 40% of adults have been molested, groped, propositioned, or otherwise inappropriately approached.  And that may be a conservative estimate.  There are A LOT of pedophiles out there.  I think the registered numbers are but the tip of the iceberg.

ITA~I have yet to tell someone when I didn't hear those tragic words come right back to me that it indeed happened to them also, and it's usually a member or friend of the family. I think civil commitment after they serve every day of their sentence would be better than registering them and dumping them back into our communities, especially when you consider that the offender is responsible for registering themselves???? That's absurd. I did finally meet with William D. Murphy, MD in Memphis, TN to try to figure out WHY these monsters molest children, and the scary part is there is really not a definitive answer, yet many.

Pretty easy for them to fall through a crack and start over somewhere with a new name.

I have a friend who thought a neighbour was behaving suspiciously around her kids...offering them way too much money for yard work, etc.  She ran his name through the register, and there was nothing.  Then she got a friend in the PD to check (she lived in a small town), and, sure enough, the guy was supposed to be registered under a different name. 

That guy wound up back in court, bue I haven't heard what happened after that.

[islandmonkey]

I never told.  There was only the one instance, but the guy pursued me somewhat.  He was an acquaintance of my parents, and worked at the school I attended.  It never occurred to me to tell my parents.  I just did my best to avoid the guy, and was never alone with him again.

So, girls don't tell, either.  I don't know if it was due to embarrassment, or my upbringing, which emphasized doing what I was told.

OHHHHHHH JaneTruth, I am so sorry to here you had to endure this also It breaks my heart to hear just how many victims are out there  God bless you for what you went thru.

You know what, Islandmonkey?  I'm willing to bet that 30% to 40% of adults have been molested, groped, propositioned, or otherwise inappropriately approached.  And that may be a conservative estimate.  There are A LOT of pedophiles out there.  I think the registered numbers are but the tip of the iceberg.

ITA~I have yet to tell someone when I didn't hear those tragic words come right back to me that it indeed happened to them also, and it's usually a member or friend of the family. I think civil commitment after they serve every day of their sentence would be better than registering them and dumping them back into our communities, especially when you consider that the offender is responsible for registering themselves???? That's absurd. I did finally meet with William D. Murphy, MD in Memphis, TN to try to figure out WHY these monsters molest children, and the scary part is there is really not a definitive answer, yet many.

Pretty easy for them to fall through a crack and start over somewhere with a new name.

I have a friend who thought a neighbour was behaving suspiciously around her kids...offering them way too much money for yard work, etc.  She ran his name through the register, and there was nothing.  Then she got a friend in the PD to check (she lived in a small town), and, sure enough, the guy was supposed to be registered under a different name. 

That guy wound up back in court, bue I haven't heard what happened after that.

I hope they lock him up, stamp child molester on his forehead and throw away the key. Thank God she followed her instincts and was proactive or God knows she'd be in the same battle we live thru.

[janetruth]

Good night, y'all...

[islandmonkey]

Good night, y'all...

good night janetruth and thanks for all your encouraging words... hugs for you from me and my little beach bum!

[Fuzzball]

Nice and Smooth, Bearly! 


Jane Wrote just before the change:

The problem seems to me to be that they act on their desires.  Until we have thought police, what people think about is their own business.  The tricky part comes in teaching children not to do things that are wrong.  And, it makes sense that, once they have actually laid hands on a child, the damage is done and there is no cure.  If, as the grandfather I mentioned earlier said, it makes them that excited, it isn't going to be changeable through counselling.

******************************************************************************

You've hit a very important point. What is it that causes someone to "get stuck" at a given emotional developmental level? Not always, but often, it's sexual trauma. If the trauma is never known by a caring parent, then there is no chance to compensate, and it can be a cycle that just repeats.

A knowing, caring parent, present to address what has to be done at the time, is so very important to a victim of that kind of abuse!!! All of that concern, action, and repair is what is almost impossible to replicate for an adult. There are so many layers by the time adulthood has been reached. Sexual arousal is already patterned, fantasy and discovery already set, and on and on.

Great point, especially with boys because even at a very young age they are ashamed, and many never tell, some decades later.

It's not a popular thing to say, and TRUST ME, I'm not homophobic, but similarly, if you look at the medical statistics regarding adult male homosexuality, the incidents of same sex childhood sexual trauma is over 50 times that in the straight population. It's very difficult to obtain reliable statistics because it's dependent upon the willingness to tell. You can't trust religious statistics regarding the topic, or gay activist's statistics; both have an agenda. The stats I've referenced are from a rather famous, large study published in the Journal of American Medical Association (JAMA), and in the conclusions they felt the incidence was higher than they could document.

I saw that study on AFA, but not on JAMA. I agree that you can't trust religious stats or the ones gay organizations conduct, necessarily. Actually, from studying the abuse victims themselves, the APA concluded that homosexuals are LESS likely to molest children, because the overwhelming majority of abuse victims are GIRLS. 93% of child molesters are male. According to studies conducted by APA, the LA Times, and the Clarke Institute, same-sex molestation accounts for about a third or less of all pedophile cases. 2/3 of pedophiles are men sexually molesting little girls, but nobody ever says a little girl shouldn't have a male math or science teacher, male priest, male therapist, male doctor, etc...

Moreover, the majority of pedophiles molest their own children or stepchildren. It's easier to control the victim and keep it secret that way. It's a lot riskier for the pedophile to approach and molest strange children, so this is much rarer. Many male pedophiles actually marry to get access to the woman's children.

Pretty consistently 1/5-1/3 of pedophiles target boys. The rest target girls. So girls are actually in a LOT more danger. Girls are just as ashamed of sexual molestation as boys are, too. The pedophiles themselves are all ashamed, as well, yet study after study, year after year, has the same 1/5-1/3 reporting that their victims were all boys, while the rest only want little girls.

A few experts have suggested that the pedophile doesn't care which gender the child is, but statistics and interviews really don't bear this out.   

[higherhopes]

I just wanted to remind everyone because the anniversary of a special childs death is coming up..............................................If you know of anyone who might have a Ferret in their home and also a child, tell them this is very dangerous.......some people dont know that a ferret is a danger to young children and I try to warn people often.....

Thanks for the heads up~is it germ related or something else???

No,  not germ related.................A ferret will actually ingest the flesh of a infant if given the chance....very dangerous.....I want everyone to be aware!

[Fuzzball]

I never told.  There was only the one instance, but the guy pursued me somewhat.  He was an acquaintance of my parents, and worked at the school I attended.  It never occurred to me to tell my parents.  I just did my best to avoid the guy, and was never alone with him again.

So, girls don't tell, either.  I don't know if it was due to embarrassment, or my upbringing, which emphasized doing what I was told.

OHHHHHHH JaneTruth, I am so sorry to here you had to endure this also It breaks my heart to hear just how many victims are out there  God bless you for what you went thru.

You know what, Islandmonkey?  I'm willing to bet that 30% to 40% of adults have been molested, groped, propositioned, or otherwise inappropriately approached.  And that may be a conservative estimate.  There are A LOT of pedophiles out there.  I think the registered numbers are but the tip of the iceberg.

ITA~I have yet to tell someone when I didn't hear those tragic words come right back to me that it indeed happened to them also, and it's usually a member or friend of the family. I think civil commitment after they serve every day of their sentence would be better than registering them and dumping them back into our communities, especially when you consider that the offender is responsible for registering themselves???? That's absurd. I did finally meet with William D. Murphy, MD in Memphis, TN to try to figure out WHY these monsters molest children, and the scary part is there is really not a definitive answer, yet many.

Pretty easy for them to fall through a crack and start over somewhere with a new name.

I have a friend who thought a neighbour was behaving suspiciously around her kids...offering them way too much money for yard work, etc.  She ran his name through the register, and there was nothing.  Then she got a friend in the PD to check (she lived in a small town), and, sure enough, the guy was supposed to be registered under a different name. 

That guy wound up back in court, bue I haven't heard what happened after that.

I hope they lock him up, stamp child molester on his forehead and throw away the key. Thank God she followed her instincts and was proactive or God knows she'd be in the same battle we live thru.

I'm glad she was paying attention. A lot of people wouldn't even notice. Of course it's different now, than it was when we were growing up. Adults are a lot more aware of that sort of thing, and more concerned about it. And good for you btw for going the distance to keep your son safe. There are women out there who turn a blind eye because they'd rather do that, than be single, believe it or not!

[islandmonkey]

Nice and Smooth, Bearly! 


Jane Wrote just before the change:

The problem seems to me to be that they act on their desires.  Until we have thought police, what people think about is their own business.  The tricky part comes in teaching children not to do things that are wrong.  And, it makes sense that, once they have actually laid hands on a child, the damage is done and there is no cure.  If, as the grandfather I mentioned earlier said, it makes them that excited, it isn't going to be changeable through counselling.

******************************************************************************

You've hit a very important point. What is it that causes someone to "get stuck" at a given emotional developmental level? Not always, but often, it's sexual trauma. If the trauma is never known by a caring parent, then there is no chance to compensate, and it can be a cycle that just repeats.

A knowing, caring parent, present to address what has to be done at the time, is so very important to a victim of that kind of abuse!!! All of that concern, action, and repair is what is almost impossible to replicate for an adult. There are so many layers by the time adulthood has been reached. Sexual arousal is already patterned, fantasy and discovery already set, and on and on.

Great point, especially with boys because even at a very young age they are ashamed, and many never tell, some decades later.

It's not a popular thing to say, and TRUST ME, I'm not homophobic, but similarly, if you look at the medical statistics regarding adult male homosexuality, the incidents of same sex childhood sexual trauma is over 50 times that in the straight population. It's very difficult to obtain reliable statistics because it's dependent upon the willingness to tell. You can't trust religious statistics regarding the topic, or gay activist's statistics; both have an agenda. The stats I've referenced are from a rather famous, large study published in the Journal of American Medical Association (JAMA), and in the conclusions they felt the incidence was higher than they could document.

I saw that study on AFA, but not on JAMA. I agree that you can't trust religious stats or the ones gay organizations conduct, necessarily. Actually, from studying the abuse victims themselves, the APA concluded that homosexuals are LESS likely to molest children, because the overwhelming majority of abuse victims are GIRLS. 93% of child molesters are male. According to studies conducted by APA, the LA Times, and the Clarke Institute, same-sex molestation accounts for about a third or less of all pedophile cases. 2/3 of pedophiles are men sexually molesting little girls, but nobody ever says a little girl shouldn't have a male math or science teacher, male priest, male therapist, male doctor, etc...

Moreover, the majority of pedophiles molest their own children or stepchildren. It's easier to control the victim and keep it secret that way. It's a lot riskier for the pedophile to approach and molest strange children, so this is much rarer. Many male pedophiles actually marry to get access to the woman's children.

Pretty consistently 1/5-1/3 of pedophiles target boys. The rest target girls. So girls are actually in a LOT more danger. Girls are just as ashamed of sexual molestation as boys are, too. The pedophiles themselves are all ashamed, as well, yet study after study, year after year, has the same 1/5-1/3 reporting that their victims were all boys, while the rest only want little girls.

A few experts have suggested that the pedophile doesn't care which gender the child is, but statistics and interviews really don't bear this out.   

I disagree from my own research that went on over a yr and an interview with one of the top MD's in this field. I have lost a bulk of that material due to my computer crashing, but male predators who prefer boys average around 150-200 victims, here are some stats I do have on male victims and failure to disclose:

http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/male-victims-of-sexual-abuse.html

Male victims of sexual abuse constitute an extremely under-identified, under-served and frequently misunderstood population. Prevalence rates for males ranged from 3% - 29% (as cited in Barnett et al., 1997, p. 761).

Though sexual abuse is under-reported by both males and females, males are in a unique position. They are far less likely to disclose sexual abuse due to the issues identified in the table below.


Why Males Don't Disclose
 
  A cultural bias maintains that males cannot be victims. Males are expected to be confident, knowledgeable, and aggressive. To be a victim means one is an inadequate male.

  If the boy's body has responded sexually, he feels he is somehow responsible for the sexual abuse.

  Male victims of sexual abuse struggle with issues of homosexuality as most offenders are male. Their homophobia plus their confusion and fear encourage silence. Not to mention the social stigma attached to homosexuality.

  If a boy receives money for sex, he is less likely to be perceived as a victim.

  If a boy has a homosexual orientation, he is often blamed for the "seduction" of the older male, instead of being acknowledged as a legitimate victim of sexual abuse.

  Molestation by an older female is often viewed positively as a kind of "initiation rite" into manhood. Cultural pressure encourages participation while denying feelings.

  Male victims of sexual abuse, more than female victims, may fear loss of freedom and independence if the sexual abuse should be made public.

  Fear of reprisals from the offender plays a role in under-reporting.

  When boys are victimized, they tend to be blamed more for their abuse and are viewed as less in need of care and support.

  Boys fear negative judgment by family and friends.

  Embarrassment and/or confusion prevent male victims of sexual abuse from disclosing.

 





Some Statistics on Male Victims of Sexual Abuse:


  Within the past few years, North American researchers have found that one out of six boys is a victim of sexual abuse (Dorais, 2002, p. 162).

  Researchers surveyed 1,213 grade 6 - 8 students at Toronto area schools on whether they had been a victim of unwanted sex behaviours in the previous 6 weeks: 22% of males reported having been victimized (Blackwell, 20023).

  Canadian estimates have shown that there are close to five million male victims of sexual abuse, most of which are unwanted sexual touching (Matthews, 1996, p. 154).

  In a Los Angeles Times poll conducted in 1990 with 2,626 men and women over 18 years of age, Finkelhor and Associates (19905) discovered that 16% of the men recalled a history of sexual abuse. The median age for these male victims was 9.9 years of age (as cited in Wiehe, 1998, p. 216).

  According to Dorais (2002, p. 177) two trends are evident in the existing statistics on male victims of sexual abuse:
  ¤  the more recent the research, the higher the incidence of abuse
  ¤  with growing awareness, more men seem willing to disclose

  In one study of 30 male victims of sexual abuse, the average age at the first time of abuse was 8 years, 4 months (Dorais, 2002, p. 1848).

  32% of (or an estimated 4,519) child sexual abuse investigations conducted with Social Services Agencies in Canada in 1998 involved males. 16% of these investigations involved boys in the 4 - 7 age group (Trocme et al., 2001, p. 659).

[Fuzzball]

Nice and Smooth, Bearly! 


Jane Wrote just before the change:

The problem seems to me to be that they act on their desires.  Until we have thought police, what people think about is their own business.  The tricky part comes in teaching children not to do things that are wrong.  And, it makes sense that, once they have actually laid hands on a child, the damage is done and there is no cure.  If, as the grandfather I mentioned earlier said, it makes them that excited, it isn't going to be changeable through counselling.

******************************************************************************

You've hit a very important point. What is it that causes someone to "get stuck" at a given emotional developmental level? Not always, but often, it's sexual trauma. If the trauma is never known by a caring parent, then there is no chance to compensate, and it can be a cycle that just repeats.

A knowing, caring parent, present to address what has to be done at the time, is so very important to a victim of that kind of abuse!!! All of that concern, action, and repair is what is almost impossible to replicate for an adult. There are so many layers by the time adulthood has been reached. Sexual arousal is already patterned, fantasy and discovery already set, and on and on.

Great point, especially with boys because even at a very young age they are ashamed, and many never tell, some decades later.

It's not a popular thing to say, and TRUST ME, I'm not homophobic, but similarly, if you look at the medical statistics regarding adult male homosexuality, the incidents of same sex childhood sexual trauma is over 50 times that in the straight population. It's very difficult to obtain reliable statistics because it's dependent upon the willingness to tell. You can't trust religious statistics regarding the topic, or gay activist's statistics; both have an agenda. The stats I've referenced are from a rather famous, large study published in the Journal of American Medical Association (JAMA), and in the conclusions they felt the incidence was higher than they could document.

Absolutely~pedophiles who prefer boys average arounf 150-200 victims versus pedophiles that yarget girls, around 15. I didn't want to go there either, bit my son's psychologist stated that even at age 3 boys are homophobic and that is what causes the shame that prevents then from talking. It is very hard to document because more victims than not don't tell.

I couldn't verify your JAMA study--you have to register with them & give credit card # to get in. But the American Psychological Association, and their counterpart in Britain, and APA studies over the years from 1980's to the present, keep returning the same results. For every 3 males who report being molested by a man, there are 9 or ten females. Some of the men who molest boys are waaaay more prolific than their heterosexual counterparts, and yet the number of victims still comes out to 1/3 boys, 2/3 girls on average, and the convictions still come out to 1/5-1/3 gay, 2/3 or more straight.

This is very consistent whether the study as APA or a university study.  I think people just are more outraged when it's male same-sex, and so it gets a great deal more stress.

[islandmonkey]

I never told.  There was only the one instance, but the guy pursued me somewhat.  He was an acquaintance of my parents, and worked at the school I attended.  It never occurred to me to tell my parents.  I just did my best to avoid the guy, and was never alone with him again.

So, girls don't tell, either.  I don't know if it was due to embarrassment, or my upbringing, which emphasized doing what I was told.

OHHHHHHH JaneTruth, I am so sorry to here you had to endure this also It breaks my heart to hear just how many victims are out there  God bless you for what you went thru.

You know what, Islandmonkey?  I'm willing to bet that 30% to 40% of adults have been molested, groped, propositioned, or otherwise inappropriately approached.  And that may be a conservative estimate.  There are A LOT of pedophiles out there.  I think the registered numbers are but the tip of the iceberg.

ITA~I have yet to tell someone when I didn't hear those tragic words come right back to me that it indeed happened to them also, and it's usually a member or friend of the family. I think civil commitment after they serve every day of their sentence would be better than registering them and dumping them back into our communities, especially when you consider that the offender is responsible for registering themselves???? That's absurd. I did finally meet with William D. Murphy, MD in Memphis, TN to try to figure out WHY these monsters molest children, and the scary part is there is really not a definitive answer, yet many.

Pretty easy for them to fall through a crack and start over somewhere with a new name.

I have a friend who thought a neighbour was behaving suspiciously around her kids...offering them way too much money for yard work, etc.  She ran his name through the register, and there was nothing.  Then she got a friend in the PD to check (she lived in a small town), and, sure enough, the guy was supposed to be registered under a different name. 

That guy wound up back in court, bue I haven't heard what happened after that.

I hope they lock him up, stamp child molester on his forehead and throw away the key. Thank God she followed her instincts and was proactive or God knows she'd be in the same battle we live thru.

I'm glad she was paying attention. A lot of people wouldn't even notice. Of course it's different now, than it was when we were growing up. Adults are a lot more aware of that sort of thing, and more concerned about it. And good for you btw for going the distance to keep your son safe. There are women out there who turn a blind eye because they'd rather do that, than be single, believe it or not!

Thanks, I did also learn that during my yr of trying to make sense of what doesn't make sense. The rape crisis center told me that many women turn a blind eye, IMO, they should lose their kids if you choose a monster over your child.

[higherhopes]

Did I hear that it has come out that one of the things that LE found when doing the search on Caseys comp.  was that she had made a missing persons poster even before Caylee had come up missing?

[islandmonkey]

Did I hear that it has come out that one of the things that LE found when doing the search on Caseys comp.  was that she had made a missing persons poster even before Caylee had come up missing?

I heard that too, but not sure if it was a rumor or not.......weird!

Good night, need to hit the monkey bunkey 

[higherhopes]

Did I hear that it has come out that one of the things that LE found when doing the search on Caseys comp.  was that she had made a missing persons poster even before Caylee had come up missing?

I heard that too, but not sure if it was a rumor or not.......weird!

Good night, need to hit the monkey bunkey 

Good night.........Ill be right behind you!

[crazybabyborg]

Sorry, Fuzzball! I wasn't ignoring you, I was in the Monkey Lounge working on avis!

Yeah, I agree with what you are saying! The results of the study I was referring to were specifically to determine what % of adult homosexual males were victims of same sex childhood sexual trauma vs the same control group among straight male adults.

There were no comparisons made or sought to determine frequency of incidents among male vs female. Only males were looked at in the study.

[Fuzzball]

I never told.  There was only the one instance, but the guy pursued me somewhat.  He was an acquaintance of my parents, and worked at the school I attended.  It never occurred to me to tell my parents.  I just did my best to avoid the guy, and was never alone with him again.

So, girls don't tell, either.  I don't know if it was due to embarrassment, or my upbringing, which emphasized doing what I was told.

Janetrue, I think it's about respect for authority and the kind of obedience that children have to be trained in. Kids often just do what an adult tells them to do, and if he says don't tell you don't tell. Children feel ashamed after, and they don't really feel like they can stand up to an adult and say no.

Most sexually abused kids don't tell. Gender doesn't make a difference. Little girls are just as much ashamed of it as little boys.

[crazybabyborg]

I'm amazed at how many incidences of childhood sexual abuse come up anytime any group of people feel comfortable enough to talk.

I really do think that the frequency of it is far greater than any study shows.

[Fuzzball]

Sorry, Fuzzball! I wasn't ignoring you, I was in the Monkey Lounge working on avis!

Yeah, I agree with what you are saying! The results of the study I was referring to was specifically to determine what % of adult homosexual males were victims of same sex childhood sexual trauma vs the same control group among straight male adults.

There were no comparisons made or sought to determine frequency of incidents among male vs female. Only males were looked at in the study.

Cool. I get it. Yeah, I'd read that study too. I don't know what to think of it. I know several very hetero guys who were molested as children. The molestation doesn't seem to have changed their orientation at all.  I know one gay guy who was molested, but he was already gay before then. He was planning to marry Batman by the time he was 4--the molestation didn't happen til he was 7. And I know lots of gay guys who never were molested. So who knows. I can't tell if there's a connection at all.

[crazybabyborg]

I'm going to take a shower. If I don't get back, have a great night, Monkeys!!!   

[Fuzzball]

Nice and Smooth, Bearly! 


Jane Wrote just before the change:

The problem seems to me to be that they act on their desires.  Until we have thought police, what people think about is their own business.  The tricky part comes in teaching children not to do things that are wrong.  And, it makes sense that, once they have actually laid hands on a child, the damage is done and there is no cure.  If, as the grandfather I mentioned earlier said, it makes them that excited, it isn't going to be changeable through counselling.

******************************************************************************

You've hit a very important point. What is it that causes someone to "get stuck" at a given emotional developmental level? Not always, but often, it's sexual trauma. If the trauma is never known by a caring parent, then there is no chance to compensate, and it can be a cycle that just repeats.

A knowing, caring parent, present to address what has to be done at the time, is so very important to a victim of that kind of abuse!!! All of that concern, action, and repair is what is almost impossible to replicate for an adult. There are so many layers by the time adulthood has been reached. Sexual arousal is already patterned, fantasy and discovery already set, and on and on.

Great point, especially with boys because even at a very young age they are ashamed, and many never tell, some decades later.

It's not a popular thing to say, and TRUST ME, I'm not homophobic, but similarly, if you look at the medical statistics regarding adult male homosexuality, the incidents of same sex childhood sexual trauma is over 50 times that in the straight population. It's very difficult to obtain reliable statistics because it's dependent upon the willingness to tell. You can't trust religious statistics regarding the topic, or gay activist's statistics; both have an agenda. The stats I've referenced are from a rather famous, large study published in the Journal of American Medical Association (JAMA), and in the conclusions they felt the incidence was higher than they could document.

I saw that study on AFA, but not on JAMA. I agree that you can't trust religious stats or the ones gay organizations conduct, necessarily. Actually, from studying the abuse victims themselves, the APA concluded that homosexuals are LESS likely to molest children, because the overwhelming majority of abuse victims are GIRLS. 93% of child molesters are male. According to studies conducted by APA, the LA Times, and the Clarke Institute, same-sex molestation accounts for about a third or less of all pedophile cases. 2/3 of pedophiles are men sexually molesting little girls, but nobody ever says a little girl shouldn't have a male math or science teacher, male priest, male therapist, male doctor, etc...

Moreover, the majority of pedophiles molest their own children or stepchildren. It's easier to control the victim and keep it secret that way. It's a lot riskier for the pedophile to approach and molest strange children, so this is much rarer. Many male pedophiles actually marry to get access to the woman's children.

Pretty consistently 1/5-1/3 of pedophiles target boys. The rest target girls. So girls are actually in a LOT more danger. Girls are just as ashamed of sexual molestation as boys are, too. The pedophiles themselves are all ashamed, as well, yet study after study, year after year, has the same 1/5-1/3 reporting that their victims were all boys, while the rest only want little girls.

A few experts have suggested that the pedophile doesn't care which gender the child is, but statistics and interviews really don't bear this out.   

I disagree from my own research that went on over a yr and an interview with one of the top MD's in this field. I have lost a bulk of that material due to my computer crashing, but male predators who prefer boys average around 150-200 victims, here are some stats I do have on male victims and failure to disclose:

http://www.child-abuse-effects.com/male-victims-of-sexual-abuse.html

Male victims of sexual abuse constitute an extremely under-identified, under-served and frequently misunderstood population. Prevalence rates for males ranged from 3% - 29% (as cited in Barnett et al., 1997, p. 761).

Though sexual abuse is under-reported by both males and females, males are in a unique position. They are far less likely to disclose sexual abuse due to the issues identified in the table below.


Why Males Don't Disclose
 
  A cultural bias maintains that males cannot be victims. Males are expected to be confident, knowledgeable, and aggressive. To be a victim means one is an inadequate male.

  If the boy's body has responded sexually, he feels he is somehow responsible for the sexual abuse.

  Male victims of sexual abuse struggle with issues of homosexuality as most offenders are male. Their homophobia plus their confusion and fear encourage silence. Not to mention the social stigma attached to homosexuality.

  If a boy receives money for sex, he is less likely to be perceived as a victim.

  If a boy has a homosexual orientation, he is often blamed for the "seduction" of the older male, instead of being acknowledged as a legitimate victim of sexual abuse.

  Molestation by an older female is often viewed positively as a kind of "initiation rite" into manhood. Cultural pressure encourages participation while denying feelings.

  Male victims of sexual abuse, more than female victims, may fear loss of freedom and independence if the sexual abuse should be made public.

  Fear of reprisals from the offender plays a role in under-reporting.

  When boys are victimized, they tend to be blamed more for their abuse and are viewed as less in need of care and support.

  Boys fear negative judgment by family and friends.

  Embarrassment and/or confusion prevent male victims of sexual abuse from disclosing.

 





Some Statistics on Male Victims of Sexual Abuse:


  Within the past few years, North American researchers have found that one out of six boys is a victim of sexual abuse (Dorais, 2002, p. 162).

  Researchers surveyed 1,213 grade 6 - 8 students at Toronto area schools on whether they had been a victim of unwanted sex behaviours in the previous 6 weeks: 22% of males reported having been victimized (Blackwell, 20023).

  Canadian estimates have shown that there are close to five million male victims of sexual abuse, most of which are unwanted sexual touching (Matthews, 1996, p. 154).

  In a Los Angeles Times poll conducted in 1990 with 2,626 men and women over 18 years of age, Finkelhor and Associates (19905) discovered that 16% of the men recalled a history of sexual abuse. The median age for these male victims was 9.9 years of age (as cited in Wiehe, 1998, p. 216).

  According to Dorais (2002, p. 177) two trends are evident in the existing statistics on male victims of sexual abuse:
  ¤  the more recent the research, the higher the incidence of abuse
  ¤  with growing awareness, more men seem willing to disclose

  In one study of 30 male victims of sexual abuse, the average age at the first time of abuse was 8 years, 4 months (Dorais, 2002, p. 1848).

  32% of (or an estimated 4,519) child sexual abuse investigations conducted with Social Services Agencies in Canada in 1998 involved males. 16% of these investigations involved boys in the 4 - 7 age group (Trocme et al., 2001, p. 659).

29-32% is still only 1/3. If 29% of victims are boys, that means 71% are girls. If 32% are boys, then 68% are girls. It's still way more girls than boys. Both are under-reporting. I'm not saying boys shouldn't be protected-they should. But just because 30 boys are molested doesn't mean suddenly you figure the 70 molested girls are over-reported or don't count.

I'm just glad that you research all this stuff and that you protect your son, and don't make him feel that he has to hide it from you. He knows you're on his side, and that's the most important thing.