Cemetery Freak

[LouiseVargas]

I'm a cemetery freak. I love to read the headstones and dates of birth and death on each marker and wonder about each person's life.  

My grandparents, stepfather and my mother are buried in an orthodox Jewish cemetery in East Los Angeles and Hebrew was inscribed on their headstones.

After my daughter studied Hebrew at Fairfax HS and studied in Jerusalem she could read the headstones. I learned my grandpa was the son of a famous Rabbi in the Ukraine. My grandma came from a family of Rabbis from Minsk. I almost fainted from the enlightenment. My daughter told me about the background of my stepfather who also descended from Rabbis. He changed his birth name from Asher to Harry.

One time we had an episode. We went on a Sunday afternoon to visit my mother in the Home of Peace. There was a sign saying "we will shut the gate at 5 p.m." We visited my mother and looked around at other graves and Kristi read the Hebrew. She said this one is a most holy Rabbi. Another plot was surrounded by a fence so we couldn't even see inside because he was too holy to be seen. We explored and kept an eye on the time. At 4:45 p.m we drove to the exit gate and it was closed and locked with a thick iron chain. We were locked inside the cemetery. Neither of us are afraid of ghosts. There was a pay phone a few yards away and two big dogs. I looked at her and said "You are better with dogs than I am." She passed the dogs and dialed 911. It was just before cell phones. She got back in the car and we waited. We noticed the phone number of the cemetery on the neon sign. She went back to the pay phone and called that number and spoke to someone who said help is on the way.

We waited and no one came to rescue us. I said to Kristi, "We might be here all night." I had visions of not showing up for work on Monday and telling my boss I got trapped in the cemetery. She said, "Don't worry Mom, I'll climb the fence (which was very daunting) and get us a six pack Then we'll pee in the bushes. I'll protect you from the dogs." It was cold. We sat and waited. No one came.

Suddenly a guy who looked like a homeless bum approached the gate,took a key and unlocked the padlock. We were skeered but realized he was our savior. I rolled down the window and told him we were locked in 15 minutes before the gate was supposed to be closed. No one checked to see if any cars were still on the property. He said he was the night watchman and sat in a little building and did his homework He was protecting the cemetery from vandalism. He let us out and then locked the gate.

In 1968, my mother purchased a crypt on the 7th tier in the Jewish Beth Olam section of what is now called Hollywood Forever. It cost $700. Now it is worth $7K. Real estate! Since my daughter became religious she said Nana could only be buried in the ground. So we bought a plot and had an ultra orthodox burial with each of us wearing torn black ribbons on our arms. Jews are buried in closed wood coffin with no nails in a white shroud. My daughter was taking a class in video production and filmed the whole thing. In my shock, I didn't even remember that I was tasked with taking a shovel and scooping dirt to throw upon the coffin. It made a terrible hollow sound. Kristi's video contained all the details such as how the coffin was bound together by wood, how the particles of dirt looked when they fell upon the wood coffin. Then Kristi picked up the shovel, then my mother's sister's and their husband.

Moving on, I have covered Hollywood Forever in pics. I still own that crypt my mother was not buried in. I'm keeping that for myself. I'll have to make some legal document so that my daughter won't bury me in the ground. I have pics from DeMille to Bugsy Siegle to Norma Talmadge to Jayne Mansfield to Tyrone Power to Clifton Webb to Iron Eyes Cody and Mrs. Iron Eyes Cody. Valentino is there too, hidden in the last corridor of one of the mausoleums. I have so many pics. How about Hattie McDaniel?

I know this is a long post. I seem to be the night owl. It is after 3 a.m. Why am I still awake? Because I have more to tell.

When Judith died, I discovered another exclusive cemetery in the midst of Westwood with UCLA just up the street. It is a very private cemetery surrounded by high rise condos which filter out the sound of the busy traffic. If you close your eyes, it is a green park. Judith was cremated (a no-no for Jews) and encrypted in a locked area called the Private Estates. I have to give my driver's license in exchange for the key. I know Judith got a kick out of being interred next door to Fanny Brice and her entire family. Judith could imitate Streisand as Fanny Brice saying "Hello Gorgeous." The website had a map which could be printed but not downloaded.

Last time, I looked everywhere for Roy Orbison and Frank Zappa, whose graves were on the map but I couldn't find them. I chatted with the receptionist Lamont and he told me their graves are not marked and the staff doesn't even know exactly where they are.

Yet, out in the open are Rodney Dangerfield, Jack Lemon, Natalie Wood, Truman Capote, Carroll O'Connor and his entire family.

I don't know why I am so fascinated with cemeteries but I am. If you want to see pics, let me know.

[justinsmama]

I would like to see pics! My maternal grandparents have a lovely stone marker. Even as a young child (8 years old when Grandma passed), I have seen beauty in their marker.

[pdh3]

Louise - fascinating!!!! I would LOVE to see the pictures too!

[San]

I'm a cemetery freak. I love to read the headstones and dates of birth and death on each marker and wonder about each person's life.  

My grandparents, stepfather and my mother are buried in an orthodox Jewish cemetery in East Los Angeles and Hebrew was inscribed on their headstones.

After my daughter studied Hebrew at Fairfax HS and studied in Jerusalem she could read the headstones. I learned my grandpa was the son of a famous Rabbi in the Ukraine. My grandma came from a family of Rabbis from Minsk. I almost fainted from the enlightenment. My daughter told me about the background of my stepfather who also descended from Rabbis. He changed his birth name from Asher to Harry.

One time we had an episode. We went on a Sunday afternoon to visit my mother in the Home of Peace. There was a sign saying "we will shut the gate at 5 p.m." We visited my mother and looked around at other graves and Kristi read the Hebrew. She said this one is a most holy Rabbi. Another plot was surrounded by a fence so we couldn't even see inside because he was too holy to be seen. We explored and kept an eye on the time. At 4:45 p.m we drove to the exit gate and it was closed and locked with a thick iron chain. We were locked inside the cemetery. Neither of us are afraid of ghosts. There was a pay phone a few yards away and two big dogs. I looked at her and said "You are better with dogs than I am." She passed the dogs and dialed 911. It was just before cell phones. She got back in the car and we waited. We noticed the phone number of the cemetery on the neon sign. She went back to the pay phone and called that number and spoke to someone who said help is on the way.

We waited and no one came to rescue us. I said to Kristi, "We might be here all night." I had visions of not showing up for work on Monday and telling my boss I got trapped in the cemetery. She said, "Don't worry Mom, I'll climb the fence (which was very daunting) and get us a six pack Then we'll pee in the bushes. I'll protect you from the dogs." It was cold. We sat and waited. No one came.

Suddenly a guy who looked like a homeless bum approached the gate,took a key and unlocked the padlock. We were skeered but realized he was our savior. I rolled down the window and told him we were locked in 15 minutes before the gate was supposed to be closed. No one checked to see if any cars were still on the property. He said he was the night watchman and sat in a little building and did his homework He was protecting the cemetery from vandalism. He let us out and then locked the gate.

In 1968, my mother purchased a crypt on the 7th tier in the Jewish Beth Olam section of what is now called Hollywood Forever. It cost $700. Now it is worth $7K. Real estate! Since my daughter became religious she said Nana could only be buried in the ground. So we bought a plot and had an ultra orthodox burial with each of us wearing torn black ribbons on our arms. Jews are buried in closed wood coffin with no nails in a white shroud. My daughter was taking a class in video production and filmed the whole thing. In my shock, I didn't even remember that I was tasked with taking a shovel and scooping dirt to throw upon the coffin. It made a terrible hollow sound. Kristi's video contained all the details such as how the coffin was bound together by wood, how the particles of dirt looked when they fell upon the wood coffin. Then Kristi picked up the shovel, then my mother's sister's and their husband.

Moving on, I have covered Hollywood Forever in pics. I still own that crypt my mother was not buried in. I'm keeping that for myself. I'll have to make some legal document so that my daughter won't bury me in the ground. I have pics from DeMille to Bugsy Siegle to Norma Talmadge to Jayne Mansfield to Tyrone Power to Clifton Webb to Iron Eyes Cody and Mrs. Iron Eyes Cody. Valentino is there too, hidden in the last corridor of one of the mausoleums. I have so many pics. How about Hattie McDaniel?

I know this is a long post. I seem to be the night owl. It is after 3 a.m. Why am I still awake? Because I have more to tell.

When Judith died, I discovered another exclusive cemetery in the midst of Westwood with UCLA just up the street. It is a very private cemetery surrounded by high rise condos which filter out the sound of the busy traffic. If you close your eyes, it is a green park. Judith was cremated (a no-no for Jews) and encrypted in a locked area called the Private Estates. I have to give my driver's license in exchange for the key. I know Judith got a kick out of being interred next door to Fanny Brice and her entire family. Judith could imitate Streisand as Fanny Brice saying "Hello Gorgeous." The website had a map which could be printed but not downloaded.

Last time, I looked everywhere for Roy Orbison and Frank Zappa, whose graves were on the map but I couldn't find them. I chatted with the receptionist Lamont and he told me their graves are not marked and the staff doesn't even know exactly where they are.

Yet, out in the open are Rodney Dangerfield, Jack Lemon, Natalie Wood, Truman Capote, Carroll O'Connor and his entire family.

I don't know why I am so fascinated with cemeteries but I am. If you want to see pics, let me know.

Louise,

If you like looking at grave stones then check out the site below.  It will show you a picture of the person (actor/actress, sports athlete, etc.), grave stone and a brief description of the person.  I have been to this site before and I find it interesting to see all the  grave stones.  Tyrone Power's is beautiful and I think Danny Kay's is nice also.  I happen to live accross the street from a cemetary all my life so it doesn't really bother me.  You would never catch me there in the night but in the day it's fine.  YES, I would like to see pictures if you have them please.  The reason I know about Danny Kay's is because when I worked at my old company we insured the cemetary he is in.  They happen to have their own web page also.  I happen to know that Robert DeNiro just bought a plot there and let me tell you it is not cheap.

http://www.findagrave.com/

Danny Kay's Grave:

http://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GRid=1316

[A's Fever]

Cemetaries can be a great way to learn history also.  There is a small cemetary not far from where I live that was once the burial ground of a coal mining town in the 1800's.  You might see graves for a whole family, deaths days apart, and you know that some disease swept through at that time.  Or, a common death day for a variety of men of various ages would be due to a mining accident (men and boys would pair up and go into the mine together - but not the man's own son, because in the case of an accident there would be no one to support the family).  Mother and baby of same date, death in childbirth.  What hard lives these folks led, and their gravestones are left to reveal it to us!  It's just fascinating.

Since my dad just passed two months ago, I have been spending a lot of time in a cemetary for a different reason.  The more modern cemetaries don't have the large ornate headstones, just a stone in the grass, but these tell a story too.  I can't get over the number of young people buried here.  Some I recognize by local crime stories, many are accident victims, many others I assume are drug deaths.  Young men in particular live a different kind of danger than did the coal miners, but often with the same results.

[mrs. red]

In our town the cemetries are also parks... lots of very, very old history here... and I too love to read the headstones and think about their lives....and the people that lived and how much stuff changed in theirl life time...

[Carnut]

In our town the cemetries are also parks... lots of very, very old history here... and I too love to read the headstones and think about their lives....and the people that lived and how much stuff changed in theirl life time...

Stuff changed in their life time? Geese, I'm amazed when I think back at what has changed since I've been around.

[San]

Cemetaries can be a great way to learn history also.  There is a small cemetary not far from where I live that was once the burial ground of a coal mining town in the 1800's.  You might see graves for a whole family, deaths days apart, and you know that some disease swept through at that time.  Or, a common death day for a variety of men of various ages would be due to a mining accident (men and boys would pair up and go into the mine together - but not the man's own son, because in the case of an accident there would be no one to support the family).  Mother and baby of same date, death in childbirth.  What hard lives these folks led, and their gravestones are left to reveal it to us!  It's just fascinating.

Since my dad just passed two months ago, I have been spending a lot of time in a cemetary for a different reason.  The more modern cemetaries don't have the large ornate headstones, just a stone in the grass, but these tell a story too.  I can't get over the number of young people buried here.  Some I recognize by local crime stories, many are accident victims, many others I assume are drug deaths.  Young men in particular live a different kind of danger than did the coal miners, but often with the same results.

I agree A's Fever.

[Kathya0427]

Louise, I read mostly and haven't posted in quite some time...but your post caught my eye...I am into genealogy and I also love to walk the cemeteries in search of my ancestors tombstones...I visited an old cemetery in Knoxville that was donated by my gggg grandfather and a lot of my kinfolks are buried there and I also found my ggggg grandfather online at findagrave.com...he was a Revolutionary War Soldier...this stuff really amazes me...thanks for sharing your story with us...

[mrs. red]

Louise .... honey, I think we are all waiting for the pictures!!

[nonesuche]

My ex and I had a business located close to the cemetary with Duane Allman's grave, it was quite popular as a visitor's site - one reason I was open-minded to possible cult/demonic worship on Aruba was due to what we witnessed occurred in nightly covert rituals at the Allman Band graves? It does happen    creepy stuff !

[justinsmama]

There is a site where you can memorialize loved ones. I entered my father's info.

http://www.findagrave.com/index.html

[Peaches]

Geez, Louise!  I thought I was the only one who liked to wander around reading the headstones!  One of the coolest cemetaries I've ever seen is Wyuka in Lincoln, Ne.  Lots of fabulous old monuments and ornate iron fencing.  Great stuff.

http://www.steveandmarta.com/graveyards/wyuka/wyuka_main.htm

This is an interesting website, lotsa pictures.

[Peaches]

The website I just referenced has some great pics of some of the monuments at Wyuka.... go to "markers" and "markers2".

[Mere]

Hi Louise.....burials in New Orleans are, for the most part, above ground.
Most of my family is buried in this cemetery.....at one time it was a race track....

http://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=cr&CRid=68207

[msmarple]

Another cemetery freak here.

I have a oil painting of a tin-roofed, one-room country church in Georgia. You can see several headstones and monuments from the cemetery that almost surrounds the church. It is not an accidental "find" - I had the painting done. Some of my great- and great-great grandparents (maybe even "more greats") are buried there, and I asked the artist to take some license to ensure that their markers would be visible.

My mother used to make this trek - a considerable drive - at least once a year, usually the weekend of Mothers Day, to clean the markers and leave flowers. Even as a child, I would wander around and read the engravings and wonder about the very short life spans, the babies buried, several deaths on the same day, and especially some of the interesting "tributes".

Since that time, I've loved tromping through old cemeteries.

I won't bore you with all of my cemetery experiences, but it's hard to beat two that might be accessible to many of you.

In Savannah, Bonaventure cemetery - one of the monuments was on the cover of "Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil" and the cemetery figured prominently in the book. Many of these monuments are amazing. Here are two links; if you Google you'll find many.

http://www.hollowhill.com/ga/bonaventure1.htm

http://tinyurl.com/y73a4n
(This one includes an interactive map, a names register, etc.)

In Atlanta, Oakland cemetery:

http://www.oaklandcemetery.com

Oakland Cemetery is in the old tradition of cemetery-as-park. Some of the mausoleums are very elaborate, and the cemetery opens a few of them for display once a year. Amazingly, the families sometimes decorate them to the Nth degree. You will see much in the way of hair jewelery and embroidery, and wax molds of hands.

On the other hand, I remember one year seeing a mausoleum done up as a beach, with sand and palms.

In October, there's a fund-raising "Birthday Party" that is a terrific event for all ages. Victorian Hat parade and contest, carriage rides, story tellers including one doing Tales of Uncle Remus, a teddybears' picnic, and a scavenger hunt (you have to read markers to find the required items).

Margaret Mitchell and Bobby Jones, are among the many notables buried there. Golf balls tend to accumulate at Jones' grave site.

The Uncle Remus storyteller performs at either the Chandler or Harris mausoleum. (The stories were written by Joel Chandler Harris.)

Some 3000 Confederate dead, and a number of Union dead, are there. As are many slaves, most in unmarked graves.

As far as I know, both cemeteries are open sunup to sundown 7 days a week. There is no admission, but small fees or donations might be suggested for special events or guided tours.

Oh - and both places have just about the oldest trees in those cities.

[LouiseVargas]

Hello,
 
I know it's taken me a long time to post these pics. I had to put them through Photoshop (my neighbor just loaned me the 6.0 version), then upload them to PhotoBkt, then insert the pics into a post on the Scared Monkeys site, preview it, then try to adjust it, and I'm still pretty sure I will blow the margins anyway. I'm sorry.

This cemetery is called Hollywood Forever, originally called Hollywood Memorial Park. This is where "old Hollywood" is buried. It is a Christian cemetery with various mausoleums and ground plots. It also has a Jewish section called Beth Olam with ground plots and a mausoleum. There are no more ground plots left in Beth Olam; it is filled up. When my mother purchased a crypt in the early 70s, the cemetery was doing very well. Over the years it fell into disrepair and the Beth Olam mausoleum was actually crumbling. Then a nationwide cemetery corporation bought the property and restored it and changed the name to Hollywood Forever. What is unique about this cemetery is that one can submit video tapes of their loved ones and there are computer stations all around the mausoleums wherein one can look up their loved ones and see videos of them. One can also make videos in advance and submit them to be viewed after death.

The Sign
That's my black car on the right.

 
Rudolf Valentino
There is a woman dressed in black who comes to his crypt every year on his birthday for all the years since he died.

 
Bugsy Siegle
He was known as a Hollywood mobster. His coffin was moved several times until he wound up here. I had a map and walked back and forth for quite a while until I found him.

 
Edward G. Robinson, Jr.

 
Clifton Webb


Iron Eyes Cody and Mrs. Iron Eyes
I was floored when I saw this. I never knew there was a Mrs. Iron Eyes. They don't mention her name at all.


The Norma Talmadge Family

 
Cecil B. DeMille Family

 
Douglas Fairbanks, Jr.
His gravesite is so beautiful that people actually plan parties around the pool for weddings, birthdays, etc.


Hattie McDaniel


Tyrone Power
This is number one on my list of most peaceful graves.


Harry Chandler and his wife Marian Otis Chandler
They were a founding family in Los Angeles. The Chandlers founded the Los Angeles Times newspaper.


Jayne Mansfield
I was amazed at it's simplicity. Mariska Hargitay is her daughter. That small word in the lower right corner of her marker ... cenotaph ... means that one can go to one of the computer stations, enter her name and see a video of her.


Louis Robert Spiwak
A complete stranger from Iowa who fought in WWI. This is the type of grave I like to wonder about. What happened in his life? He went to war, obviously settled in CA after that, and died here in Hollywood.


Betty Bess
Another stranger to me. Her black marble marker is shaped like a Star of David with her picture on the marble ... this type of monument costs a fortune. In the lower left corner, it says "Yidishe Mamela" which means little Jewish mother. I believe the strange letters are Russian. Apparently, she is buried alone ... maybe her husband was buried in Russia before she came to SoCal.


Finally, this is the area of my mother's crypt (which I will occupy). It is on the seventh tier in this beautiful pink marble mausoleum. I'm kinda creeped out about being on the seventh tier. However, my step father used to say that "the higher the crypt, the closer to God." As if, but he always meant well.


My next project is to publish pics from Pierce Brother's Memorial Park in Westwood. After that, I'll go to the Jewish Cemetery "Home of Peace" and take pics of my mother, grandparents and step father, as well as other graves I find unusual.

If anyone wants to post pics of local graves, I'd love it if you would. I find this so fascinating. Each marker holds the story of a person's entire life.

Ok, here goes.

[pdh3]

Fascinating Louise, as usual.
Those are really some beautiful and elaborate gravesites. All those famous people!
Do you know where Marilyn Monroe is buried? I have always felt bad that no one came for her until several days had passed after her death. I believe Joe DiMaggio finally stepped in and buried her.

I'd love to get to Arlington one day. I'm told it is impressive. Have you ever been there?

[San]

Thank you Louise for sharing your photos.

[LouiseVargas]

Dear pdh3,

Hello honey, yes I know where Marilyn Monroe is buried. I've visited her grave twice (same cemetery as my friend Judith - Pierce Brothers Westwood Memorial Park). Each time I have come away from there feeling terribly upset.

You pinpointed exactly what upsets me ... the fact that she was always abandoned. It took Joe a few days to take over and claim her body although they were no longer married. In 1962, when she died/was murdered, Joe contracted with a florist to put roses next to her crypt every week for twenty years. That ended in 1982 and Joltin' Joe has died and gone away. So tourists come to visit, put lipstick kisses on her marker, leave flowers and notes. I pick roses from my Armenian neighbor's garden out back, and add some rosemary and wrap them and put them next to her marker.


Marilyn Monroe - October 25, 2006
Those are my roses.


I printed the lyrics to "Candle in the Wind" by Elton John on pink paper with maroon font.  You will notice at the bottom, I copied Klaas' candle for Natalee.

"To Marilyn from Joanie, who visits
Judith in the Private Estates back
there near Fannie Brice."
 
Candle In The Wind
Music by Elton John ~ Lyrics by Bernie Taupin
 
Goodbye Norma Jean
Though I never knew you at all
You had the grace to hold yourself
While those around you crawled
They crawled out of the woodwork
And they whispered into your brain
They set you on the treadmill
And they made you change your name

And it seems to me you lived your life
Like a candle in the wind
Never knowing who to cling to
When the rain set in
And I would have liked to have known you
But I was just a kid
Your candle burned out long before
Your legend ever did

Loneliness was tough
The toughest role you ever played
Hollywood created a superstar
And pain was the price you paid
Even when you died
Oh the press still hounded you
All the papers had to say
Was that Marilyn was found in the nude

Goodbye Norma Jean
From the young man in the 22nd row
Who sees you as something as more than sexual
More than just our Marilyn Monroe

I fully intended to create a thread in the Unsolved Crimes section because she was murdered.