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Author Topic: what about this guy?  (Read 1915 times)
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Monkey All Star Jr.
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« on: November 09, 2006, 09:07:15 AM »

Hello Fellow Mitt-Heads!!


My name is Miho. I am a Japanese woman and have lived in the states for a little while now. I am still a Japanese citizen although I hope to change that by jumping on the amnesty deal they make with the current illegal immigrants shortly after the 2006 mid-term elections (mark my words, although I do not think “legal” aliens like myself will be allowed amnesty, just the illegal ones) Sorry, off topic.


I first met Lug Nutmegger at a Starbuck’s® in Stamford, CT. I took notice of him in line when he was ordering, loudly I might add, a venti hot chocolate with whole milk AND whipped cream. My curiosity was peaked and I had to find out what kind of an idiot orders a 550 calorie beverage in this day and age because he was tall, handsome and had an intelligent quality about him (edited by Lug). Slowly I sidled next to him and we started to talk.


After a while the discussion drifted to the heated senatorial race currently raging here in CT between Sen. Joe Lieberman and Mr. Ned Lamont. I asked him who he supported and he stated neither. Confused, I restated my question “for whom will you vote?” He mentioned he would vote for Sen. Lieberman because unfortunately Alan Schlesinger, a good man and a decent Republican, doesn’t stand a bats chance out of hell of winning. He mentioned that he hates voting for the “lesser of two evils” (this I understood to mean that although Sen. Lieberman is a die-hard, big government, socially liberal Democrat he does understand the need to protect our country from those who seek to destroy it and is one of the few Democrat Senators who still has some integrity).


Lug mentioned that finally, for the 2008 presidential race, a candidate is emerging that will not be the lesser of two evils and does in fact have solutions for the issues that face our country, has the experience necessary to lead our country in the right direction, who has the ability to express his ideas and views in an articulate manner, who is socially conservative, and who can work with both parties to get things done in Washington. I was very intrigued by this statement and asked Lug to inform me to whom he was referring. Lug answered emphatically “Mitt Romney”. The excitement started to build inside me. I told Lug that I love Mitt Romney and in fact Mitt is one of the main reasons I came to the US. He then asked me to do a guest spot on this blog since his day job is keeping him busy. I agreed and so here we are.


Where to begin…I first became aware of Mitt Romney in 1999. The IOC came to Japan to review records of the 1998 Nagano Winter Olympics because of some sort of bribe scandal surrounding the Salt Lake bid for the 2002 Winter Olympics. Luckily Unfortunately the Nagano records had been destroyed. Watching the news I see this extremely handsome man appointed with the task to clean up the Salt Lake Olympics which was not only damaged in reputation but the budget was $379 million short. Who was this tall, dark, and hunky savior of the 2002 Winter Games? I follow both Japanese and US tabloids and yet I had never seen his face before. So it was in early 2002 that I gave up my quest to make Prime Minister Koizumi marry me, freed him from my basement, fled to the United States, and I began to stalk investigate now Gov. Romney of Massachusetts as a possible candidate for husband President.


Upon breaking into Mitt’s house researching Mitt Romney, I found out that not only is he handsome but he has a MBA from Harvard Business School AND received a Juris Doctorate from Harvard Law School. He was VP and later CEO of Bain and Company, a Boston-based management consulting firm, AND founded Bain Capital, a successful venture capital and investment company. Now that is a man you can take home to meet the parents.


After the huge turnaround and subsequent success of the Salt Lake Olympics, Mr. Romney ran for Governor of Massachusetts in 2002 on the Republican ticket, and won. Now, I don’t recall exactly what he accomplished as Governor, something about providing healthcare to all uninsured in the state, overcoming a $3 billion deficit to finish with a $500 million surplus in 2005, a scholarship program rewarding the top 25% of MA high school students etc, etc, WHO CARES! All I know is it got him on the TV so I could look at his gorgeous face more often.


Another reason I choose Mitt as a candidate for my future husband President is because he has no baggage. His personal, business, and political reputations are spotless. He lives clean and works hard; all the traits my traditional Japanese parents and I appreciate. I spent weeks rummaging through the trash at the Romney residence and I didn’t even find as much as an empty beer can (that said, I did find an exorbitant amount of empty Jello® boxes) Having seen how he is able to work with, and succeed in some cases, with the 85% Democratic Party controlled state legislature of Massachusetts, I know he will be an excellent husband President and will work with me with the House and Senate to find solutions and compromise to any of the marital economic and social issues facing our country today. His position on the family suggests that he will be an excellent father to our children is a social conservative and willing to fight to preserve the sanctity of marriage. In Japan we marry for life (or until your husband makes a bad business error and he is forced to commit suicide by his boss).


Did I mention Mitt is a beautiful man?


One thing I am starting to find troubling in the media lately is that Romney is often asked about is manliness. Questions like, “Is the fact that Romney is more man going to be an issue?” and “Evangelical Christians will not vote for Romney because he is more man”. More man than Ms. Christians can handle perhaps but not for me. I love his masculinity and feel a man should be strong. Who is this Evangelical woman anyhow and why does her vote matter so much?


I am not the jealous type but Mitt does have a lot of woman flocking around him. I read an article the other day that Margaret Thatcher has her eye on Mitt. A saucy little number named Ann Coulter mentioned she was interested, and even Laura Ingraham has expressed her affinity for Mitt. An impressive list of women indeed; I WILL CRUSH YOU ALL!!!


Son of a…I just finished discussing what I had so far with Lug and apparently we misunderstood each other. Lug thought I was interested in Mitt as a political candidate for President when actually my choice for Mitt is of a more personal nature. Then he informs me that Mitt is married and that the photo I have plastered all over my room, printed on my pillow and tattooed on my back is NOT of Mitt and his brothers and sisters. Apparently the people in the picture are his wife (Ann), his five sons and daughters-in-law (five sons huh, that sounds promising, maybe Project Miho Romney is still on).


Also, and this is not my fault as the English language is difficult, it seems that media folk are not stating that Mitt is “more man”, rather that he is a “Mormon” (Mormon huh? Project Miho Romney is definitely ON! He can just make me his second wife!!!) Wait…what Lug…oh hell’s bells, Project Miho Romney is off again! Now I find out Mormons no longer even practice polygamy.


Another error seems to be me mistaking “Evangelical Christians” as a woman’s name. (This is also not my fault, people in the U.S. are naming their kids all sorts of strange names these days; Shiloh, Suri, Saffron etc). It seems Evangelical Christians are basically Protestants; some denominations group together to form an alliance, like in Survivor. This is something I cannot (nor want to) comment on because in Japan normally religion does not mix with politics (except in 1990 when 25 of those nut-jobs from the Aum Shinrikyo ran in the general elections). If this type of discussion floats your boat, please visit those rascals at http://www.evangelicalsformitt.com/.


After discussing my second draft with Lug we decided to leave my post in its entirety. I have made corrections where possible. It seems Mitt Romney might make a better President than a husband after all.


I guess I will not have to destroy Margaret, Ann or Laura either. I will call off my Yakuza friends straight away.


Well I am off; I have to fly to Arizona. I am starting a new project, Project Miho McCain. My guess is that he likes Asian women. I have to do something, and quick, as my student visa runs out the end of this year and a husband (or being an illegal) is the quickest route to a green card.


Deadly Little Miho

There is always one more imbecile than you counted on
Monkey All Star Jr.
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Posts: 8878

« Reply #1 on: November 09, 2006, 09:26:10 AM »

Laughing  Laughing  Laughing

I continue to stand with the girl.
Monkey Junky
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Posts: 2524

« Reply #2 on: November 09, 2006, 11:41:11 PM »


After reading your post, I have at least 100 questions to ask.

PS: I've always like Mitt Romney.

Hope is everything. I see angels everywhere.
Monkey All Star Jr.
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Posts: 5264

God watch over our children and keep them safe.

« Reply #3 on: November 10, 2006, 09:48:36 PM »


God has FINAL Judgement!<br />
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