A woman went into a department store and told the clerk that she
wanted to return a toaster for refund because it didn't work. The
clerk told her that he couldn't give her a refund because she bought
it on special.
All of a sudden the woman threw her arms up and yelled, "Grab my
Breasts! Grab my breasts!"
The clerk didn't know what to do, so he called the store manager
who asked her if he can help. She explained that she wanted to return
the nonworking toaster for refund, and he told her that he would not
give her a refund because she bought the toaster on special.
Once again she yelled, "Grab my breasts! Grab my breasts!"
The manager was taken aback and asked her why she was yelling that
particular phrase.
She replied, "Because I like my breasts grabbed when I'm getting
screwed!"
A woman and a baby came into the doctor's office. She was told to
go into a room and wait for the doctor. He examines the baby and asks
the woman, "Is he breast fed or on the bottle?"
"Breast fed." she says.
Well, strip down to your waist." he orders.
She does.
He presses both breasts, pinches them both, and then says,
"No wonder this baby is hungry, you don't have any milk."
"Naturally," she says, "I'm his aunt...But I'm glad I came."
A middle-aged man had an obsession with women's breasts.
So he went to a psychologist and told the doctor about his
problem.
"I am going to do word association," explained the doctor.
"I am going to say a word, and you will say the first thing
that come to your mind."
"Oranges," said the doctor.
"Breasts," replied the patient.
"Apples."
"Breasts."
"Watermelons."
"Breasts."
"Wipers."
"Breasts," said the patient with the same reply.
"Wait a minute! I can see the connections between oranges,
apples, watermelons and breasts. But automobile's wipers?
Where is the connection?" asked the doctor.
"Easy...one on the left and one on the right!"
