March 28, 2024, 11:42:17 PM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
News: NEW CHILD BOARD CREATED IN THE POLITICAL SECTION FOR THE 2016 ELECTION
 
   Home   Help Login Register  
Pages: « 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 »   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: "WELCOME TO JSM'S BEGGING FOR BANNING THREAD #3  (Read 810246 times)
0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.
CasuallyCool
Monkey Junky
***
Offline Offline

Posts: 4577


What a beauty!!!


« Reply #600 on: August 12, 2009, 04:49:27 PM »

11 August 2009
 
SAN DIEGO, California -- Alcoholics need not be alone anymore! The animal company PETCO released a fantastic new product called Happy Tail Ale (a special beer for canines) recently. This revolutionary new beer has been specially designed for lonely, crying alcoholics whose only friend is a dog and has not only kept liquor stores happy, but also the A.A, who have been experiencing a sharp increase in attendees lately.

"I used to come home from another boring day at work, before opening a beer, or two, or three, or seven and kicking back on the couch. When I got to the point where I felt emotionally fcked and wanted someone to talk to, my little Snuffles used to simply look at me blankly while I contemplated suicide. Thanks to Happy Tail Ale I don't feel alone anymore. Snuffles now howl's alongside me on most nights," said a former AA member and enthusiastic shopper who wishes to remain anonymous.

Many people would ask the question, "Why not feed dog’s human beer instead of make such a fuss?" Those people who ask this question obviously have no taste whatsoever, and although a lot of dogs would not mind drinking human beer, the issues surrounding class-based drinking makes the situation a bit icky; especially for the upper-class career dogs who are required to do taste testing for pet organizations such as PETCO.

"I would never let my miniature dachshund, Rowena drink something human. What would the other dogs think of her? Dogs can be very stereotypical too and I refuse to let my shnookums get a bad rep over tasting undogly things," said Madame Nancy Fancy Shmancy, an upper-class, Californian Heiress and dog owner.

Upper-class cats deserve more than just catnip.Unfortunately, this new trend has caused a big dispute between dog and cat lovers alike. Cat lovers feel that cats are classy by nature and do not deserve to be treated like hippies through the use of cat-nip and that their animal of choice is more deserving of the more refined treatment. In order To settle these disputes, PETCO has come up with the perfect solution and they are now working on a salmon flavored kitty wine called Le kitteh connoisseur for the cat-lovers wishing to add something classy to their lives.

"This is just great! These new products will create so many opportunities for our beloved pets, who are usually required to simply stay at home and do nothing. At least this way more animal careers will be created and our animals can also have the chance to become real working citizens. Of course it may be slightly more difficult to keep the office politics under control, but to hell with it! I don't hear the economy complaining!" Said PETCO CEO James Myers when interviewed by UnNews.


      Like your new avi

"You ever seen a grown man nekkid?"
Logged

Do No Evil 
Sassycat
Monkey All Star Jr.
****
Offline Offline

Posts: 7502



« Reply #601 on: August 12, 2009, 04:49:52 PM »

Now it appears Ron Cummings put a beheaded rat in his father in laws mailbox 

   Something terrible is gonna happen before it's over with.
You can bet on it 

No doubt...   What's the meaning behind the beheaded rat?  Is that a warning?     
Logged
joesamas mama
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 34754


Patton is my babe. RIP my Josef I love you both!


« Reply #602 on: August 12, 2009, 04:52:16 PM »

11 August 2009
 
SAN DIEGO, California -- Alcoholics need not be alone anymore! The animal company PETCO released a fantastic new product called Happy Tail Ale (a special beer for canines) recently. This revolutionary new beer has been specially designed for lonely, crying alcoholics whose only friend is a dog and has not only kept liquor stores happy, but also the A.A, who have been experiencing a sharp increase in attendees lately.

"I used to come home from another boring day at work, before opening a beer, or two, or three, or seven and kicking back on the couch. When I got to the point where I felt emotionally fcked and wanted someone to talk to, my little Snuffles used to simply look at me blankly while I contemplated suicide. Thanks to Happy Tail Ale I don't feel alone anymore. Snuffles now howl's alongside me on most nights," said a former AA member and enthusiastic shopper who wishes to remain anonymous.

Many people would ask the question, "Why not feed dog’s human beer instead of make such a fuss?" Those people who ask this question obviously have no taste whatsoever, and although a lot of dogs would not mind drinking human beer, the issues surrounding class-based drinking makes the situation a bit icky; especially for the upper-class career dogs who are required to do taste testing for pet organizations such as PETCO.

"I would never let my miniature dachshund, Rowena drink something human. What would the other dogs think of her? Dogs can be very stereotypical too and I refuse to let my shnookums get a bad rep over tasting undogly things," said Madame Nancy Fancy Shmancy, an upper-class, Californian Heiress and dog owner.

Upper-class cats deserve more than just catnip.Unfortunately, this new trend has caused a big dispute between dog and cat lovers alike. Cat lovers feel that cats are classy by nature and do not deserve to be treated like hippies through the use of cat-nip and that their animal of choice is more deserving of the more refined treatment. In order To settle these disputes, PETCO has come up with the perfect solution and they are now working on a salmon flavored kitty wine called Le kitteh connoisseur for the cat-lovers wishing to add something classy to their lives.

"This is just great! These new products will create so many opportunities for our beloved pets, who are usually required to simply stay at home and do nothing. At least this way more animal careers will be created and our animals can also have the chance to become real working citizens. Of course it may be slightly more difficult to keep the office politics under control, but to hell with it! I don't hear the economy complaining!" Said PETCO CEO James Myers when interviewed by UnNews.


      Like your new avi

"You ever seen a grown man nekkid?"
I love Airplane.
Logged

My JSM Begging for Ban Button Blog: http://scaredmonkeys.net/index.php?topic=5458.0

<a href="http://www.oneplusyou.com/bb/files/countdown/countdown.swf?co=000080&amp;bgcolor=FFFFFF&amp;date_month=01&amp;date_day=20&amp;date_year=1&amp;un=OBAMA IS OUT!&amp;size=small&amp;mo=01&amp;da=20&amp;yr=2013" target="_blank">http://www.oneplusyou.com/bb/files/countdown/countdown.swf?co=000080&amp;bgcolor=FFFFFF&amp;date_month=01&amp;date_day=20&amp;date_year=1&amp;un=OBAMA IS OUT!&amp;size=small&amp;mo=01&amp;da=20&amp;yr=2013</a>
CasuallyCool
Monkey Junky
***
Offline Offline

Posts: 4577


What a beauty!!!


« Reply #603 on: August 12, 2009, 04:56:41 PM »



      Like your new avi
[/quote]

"You ever seen a grown man nekkid?"
[/quote] I love Airplane.
[/quote]

Can you talk jive?
Logged

Do No Evil 
trimmonthelake
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 43428



« Reply #604 on: August 12, 2009, 04:57:31 PM »

CC's office.
<a href="http://www.boomclips.com/flvplayer.swf?file=http://www.boomclips.com/video/hooters_girl_bar_stool_beer_trick.flv&amp;image=http://www.boomclips.com/video/hooters_girl_bar_stool_beer_trick-m.jpg&amp;autostart=false&amp;showdigits=true&amp;link=http://www.boomclips.com&amp;linkfromdisplay=true&amp;linktarget=_blank&amp;showfsbutton=false&amp;usefullscreen=false&amp;allowfullscreen=false&amp;recommendations=http://www.boomclips.com/rec.xml" target="_blank">http://www.boomclips.com/flvplayer.swf?file=http://www.boomclips.com/video/hooters_girl_bar_stool_beer_trick.flv&amp;image=http://www.boomclips.com/video/hooters_girl_bar_stool_beer_trick-m.jpg&amp;autostart=false&amp;showdigits=true&amp;link=http://www.boomclips.com&amp;linkfromdisplay=true&amp;linktarget=_blank&amp;showfsbutton=false&amp;usefullscreen=false&amp;allowfullscreen=false&amp;recommendations=http://www.boomclips.com/rec.xml</a>
Logged

  ~241~ "The Longer You Love,The Longer You Live,The Stronger You Feel,The More You Can Give."
~ Peter Frampton
trimmonthelake
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 43428



« Reply #605 on: August 12, 2009, 05:00:44 PM »

Now it appears Ron Cummings put a beheaded rat in his father in laws mailbox 

   Something terrible is gonna happen before it's over with.
You can bet on it 

No doubt...   What's the meaning behind the beheaded rat?  Is that a warning?     

That's what I'm wondering.Maybe he is warning the guy not to rat him out.
Logged

  ~241~ "The Longer You Love,The Longer You Live,The Stronger You Feel,The More You Can Give."
~ Peter Frampton
Bearlyhere
Asst Moderator
Monkey Mega Star
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 17313



« Reply #606 on: August 12, 2009, 05:05:51 PM »

I found CC.   

  Looks like he has a harem with him too. 

They are the Hooters girls he hangs out with?

The ones near us are nice and very cute.  He must bring out the animal in them.
Logged

There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world.
Time spent with monkeys is never wasted. 
I believe in miracles!
Bearlyhere
Asst Moderator
Monkey Mega Star
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 17313



« Reply #607 on: August 12, 2009, 05:09:24 PM »


 an angelic monkey

He is so cute, he must be a relative!   

Thanks, Trimmy!

 



Logged

There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world.
Time spent with monkeys is never wasted. 
I believe in miracles!
joesamas mama
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 34754


Patton is my babe. RIP my Josef I love you both!


« Reply #608 on: August 12, 2009, 05:10:56 PM »

CC's office.
<a href="http://www.boomclips.com/flvplayer.swf?file=http://www.boomclips.com/video/hooters_girl_bar_stool_beer_trick.flv&amp;image=http://www.boomclips.com/video/hooters_girl_bar_stool_beer_trick-m.jpg&amp;autostart=false&amp;showdigits=true&amp;link=http://www.boomclips.com&amp;linkfromdisplay=true&amp;linktarget=_blank&amp;showfsbutton=false&amp;usefullscreen=false&amp;allowfullscreen=false&amp;recommendations=http://www.boomclips.com/rec.xml" target="_blank">http://www.boomclips.com/flvplayer.swf?file=http://www.boomclips.com/video/hooters_girl_bar_stool_beer_trick.flv&amp;image=http://www.boomclips.com/video/hooters_girl_bar_stool_beer_trick-m.jpg&amp;autostart=false&amp;showdigits=true&amp;link=http://www.boomclips.com&amp;linkfromdisplay=true&amp;linktarget=_blank&amp;showfsbutton=false&amp;usefullscreen=false&amp;allowfullscreen=false&amp;recommendations=http://www.boomclips.com/rec.xml</a>
Hahaha. Never seen that before
Logged

My JSM Begging for Ban Button Blog: http://scaredmonkeys.net/index.php?topic=5458.0

<a href="http://www.oneplusyou.com/bb/files/countdown/countdown.swf?co=000080&amp;bgcolor=FFFFFF&amp;date_month=01&amp;date_day=20&amp;date_year=1&amp;un=OBAMA IS OUT!&amp;size=small&amp;mo=01&amp;da=20&amp;yr=2013" target="_blank">http://www.oneplusyou.com/bb/files/countdown/countdown.swf?co=000080&amp;bgcolor=FFFFFF&amp;date_month=01&amp;date_day=20&amp;date_year=1&amp;un=OBAMA IS OUT!&amp;size=small&amp;mo=01&amp;da=20&amp;yr=2013</a>
no rose colored glasses
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 45869


Zoe you will always be in my heart and soul


« Reply #609 on: August 12, 2009, 05:11:20 PM »

Now it appears Ron Cummings put a beheaded rat in his father in laws mailbox 

   Something terrible is gonna happen before it's over with.
You can bet on it 

No doubt...   What's the meaning behind the beheaded rat?  Is that a warning?     
He must think he is the Godfather of Satsuma    CC love the movie Airplane 
Logged
Bearlyhere
Asst Moderator
Monkey Mega Star
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 17313



« Reply #610 on: August 12, 2009, 05:12:27 PM »



Hi no rosie, Babybear, joesie, Sassy, trimmy, the Cas man, and anyone else I have not insulted said hi to!

 

Logged

There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world.
Time spent with monkeys is never wasted. 
I believe in miracles!
trimmonthelake
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 43428



« Reply #611 on: August 12, 2009, 05:13:44 PM »


Border Patrol in Afghanistan
(EMILIO MORENATTI, ASSOCIATED PRESS)
An Afghan border police officer in Spin Boldak guards in a post overlooking the neighboring Pakistani city of Chaman, about 60 miles southeast of Kandahar, Afghanistan, Monday, Aug 10. Afghans will head to the polls on Aug. 20 to elect new president.
Logged

  ~241~ "The Longer You Love,The Longer You Live,The Stronger You Feel,The More You Can Give."
~ Peter Frampton
Bearlyhere
Asst Moderator
Monkey Mega Star
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 17313



« Reply #612 on: August 12, 2009, 05:14:20 PM »

Now it appears Ron Cummings put a beheaded rat in his father in laws mailbox 

   Something terrible is gonna happen before it's over with.
You can bet on it 

No doubt...   What's the meaning behind the beheaded rat?  Is that a warning?     
He must think he is the Godfather of Satsuma    CC love the movie Airplane 

Where did he get the rat?  Is this the cheaper version of the Godfather?

 

Logged

There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world.
Time spent with monkeys is never wasted. 
I believe in miracles!
joesamas mama
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 34754


Patton is my babe. RIP my Josef I love you both!


« Reply #613 on: August 12, 2009, 05:14:39 PM »

I found CC.   

  Looks like he has a harem with him too. 

They are the Hooters girls he hangs out with?

The ones near us are nice and very cute.  He must bring out the animal in them.
Hi Bearly!
Logged

My JSM Begging for Ban Button Blog: http://scaredmonkeys.net/index.php?topic=5458.0

<a href="http://www.oneplusyou.com/bb/files/countdown/countdown.swf?co=000080&amp;bgcolor=FFFFFF&amp;date_month=01&amp;date_day=20&amp;date_year=1&amp;un=OBAMA IS OUT!&amp;size=small&amp;mo=01&amp;da=20&amp;yr=2013" target="_blank">http://www.oneplusyou.com/bb/files/countdown/countdown.swf?co=000080&amp;bgcolor=FFFFFF&amp;date_month=01&amp;date_day=20&amp;date_year=1&amp;un=OBAMA IS OUT!&amp;size=small&amp;mo=01&amp;da=20&amp;yr=2013</a>
no rose colored glasses
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 45869


Zoe you will always be in my heart and soul


« Reply #614 on: August 12, 2009, 05:16:06 PM »



Hi no rosie, Babybear, joesie, Sassy, trimmy, the Cas man, and anyone else I have not insulted said hi to!

 


Hi 
Logged
no rose colored glasses
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 45869


Zoe you will always be in my heart and soul


« Reply #615 on: August 12, 2009, 05:17:15 PM »


Border Patrol in Afghanistan
(EMILIO MORENATTI, ASSOCIATED PRESS)
An Afghan border police officer in Spin Boldak guards in a post overlooking the neighboring Pakistani city of Chaman, about 60 miles southeast of Kandahar, Afghanistan, Monday, Aug 10. Afghans will head to the polls on Aug. 20 to elect new president.

  I'm not sure what to say, I hope he doesn't get tired.
Logged
Bud's Girl
Monkey Junky
***
Offline Offline

Posts: 3184



« Reply #616 on: August 12, 2009, 05:17:42 PM »



Hi no rosie, Babybear, joesie, Sassy, trimmy, the Cas man, and anyone else I have not insulted said hi to!

 


You really get around RB   
Logged

The naked truth is always better than the best dressed lie.
trimmonthelake
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 43428



« Reply #617 on: August 12, 2009, 05:18:37 PM »


Honoring slain Clermont soldier
(EMILY JOURDAN, ORLANDO SENTINEL STRINGER / August 9, 2009)
A child sits outside the First United Methodist Church of Clermont Sunday, Aug. 9, 2009 after helping the Patriot Guard of Orlando salute the family of Specialist Alexander J. Miller. Specialist Miller, 21, died in Afghanistan on July 31.
Logged

  ~241~ "The Longer You Love,The Longer You Live,The Stronger You Feel,The More You Can Give."
~ Peter Frampton
trimmonthelake
Monkey Mega Star
******
Offline Offline

Posts: 43428



« Reply #618 on: August 12, 2009, 05:19:44 PM »



Hi no rosie, Babybear, joesie, Sassy, trimmy, the Cas man, and anyone else I have not insulted said hi to!

 


Hi 

 
Logged

  ~241~ "The Longer You Love,The Longer You Live,The Stronger You Feel,The More You Can Give."
~ Peter Frampton
Bearlyhere
Asst Moderator
Monkey Mega Star
*
Offline Offline

Posts: 17313



« Reply #619 on: August 12, 2009, 05:20:49 PM »



Hi no rosie, Babybear, joesie, Sassy, trimmy, the Cas man, and anyone else I have not insulted said hi to!

 


You really get around RB   

Hi BG!!

 

I'm tryin' to avoid the crazy one who wants to rip off my skirt!

 

Logged

There is no foot too small that it cannot leave an imprint on this world.
Time spent with monkeys is never wasted. 
I believe in miracles!
Pages: « 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 »   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Use of this web site in any manner signifies unconditional acceptance, without exception, of our terms of use.
Powered by SMF 1.1.13 | SMF © 2006-2011, Simple Machines LLC
 
Page created in 3.675 seconds with 19 queries.