Medical Advice Needed

[Katysmom]

Baby Update:  The baby has a doctor's appointment for 10:00 am Friday morning!  We had to decieve 'mom' a bit, but, who cares.  She knows daddy works nights and so she let's him have his visitation on Saturday.  I called her and asked if my husband and I could have her one day this week.  She told me that the only day I could have her was Friday because she doesn't go to day care on that day.  I didn't want to give her any info as to what we are up to, so I told her that I was working on the baby's blog and lost the front page with her birth weight, height, eye color, etc... I asked for that info and also asked her  how much baby weighs now.  I was shocked when she told me that she weighs 18 lbs!  According to a web site on childhood development I went to, a two year old should weigh 30 lbs.  
Grandpa and I are going grocery shopping today and are going to load her up on nutritous foods.  I, myself, was a single mother for years and I know I would of appreciated it if someone had given me some groceries for the kids, so, hopefully she won't be offended.  My son said it'll just give her extra money for booze.

[klaasend]

Baby Update:  The baby has a doctor's appointment for 10:00 am Friday morning!  We had to decieve 'mom' a bit, but, who cares.  She knows daddy works nights and so she let's him have his visitation on Saturday.  I called her and asked if my husband and I could have her one day this week.  She told me that the only day I could have her was Friday because she doesn't go to day care on that day.  I didn't want to give her any info as to what we are up to, so I told her that I was working on the baby's blog and lost the front page with her birth weight, height, eye color, etc... I asked for that info and also asked her  how much baby weighs now.  I was shocked when she told me that she weighs 18 lbs!  According to a web site on childhood development I went to, a two year old should weigh 30 lbs.  
Grandpa and I are going grocery shopping today and are going to load her up on nutritous foods.  I, myself, was a single mother for years and I know I would of appreciated it if someone had given me some groceries for the kids, so, hopefully she won't be offended.  My son said it'll just give her extra money for booze.

So happy to hear the baby has a doctors appointment!  Are you going to be going too?  I think it would be a great idea if at all possible.

[pdh3]

18 lbs is underweight for a 2 year old in most cases. You are right to be concerned. It's good to know the baby has an appointment with the Dr.

Your son should talk to the day care workers to determine what the baby eats while she is there. I wonder if they have noticed that the baby is underweight? If they haven't, then the baby should go to another day care, because obviously they aren't paying attention.

[MsVada]

a licensed childcare provider is required by law to report neglect and abuse, which includes malnutrition.  

I am surprised this provider didn't report it yet.

[Artcolley]

a licensed childcare provider is required by law to report neglect and abuse, which includes malnutrition.  

I am surprised this provider didn't report it yet.

Just an aside here, but many states have "Grandparents Rights" nowadays.
If push comes to shove, you may want to look into this.
This child sounds neglected to me.
Just my nosy 62 cents worth!

[Katysmom]

18 lbs is underweight for a 2 year old in most cases. You are right to be concerned. It's good to know the baby has an appointment with the Dr.

Your son should talk to the day care workers to determine what the baby eats while she is there. I wonder if they have noticed that the baby is underweight? If they haven't, then the baby should go to another day care, because obviously they aren't paying attention.

I don't think she eats at the babysitter's, unless it is just a morning snack.  Mom gets off work at noon, so I'm pretty sure mom feeds her lunch.  I'll have to find out for sure.

[Katysmom]

a licensed childcare provider is required by law to report neglect and abuse, which includes malnutrition.  

I am surprised this provider didn't report it yet.

Just an aside here, but many states have "Grandparents Rights" nowadays.
If push comes to shove, you may want to look into this.
This child sounds neglected to me.
Just my nosy 62 cents worth!

Artcolley:  Our state does have grandparents rights.  From what I've found so far on the internet, the grandparent rights deal mainly with visitation.  According to the statute, the grandparents can appeal to the courts for regular visitation, but not unless the custodial parent denies the g.p. visitation for at least 90 days.  I'll have to do more investigating.

[pdh3]

Katysmom - It bothers me that this baby has been cared for by a child care provider who may not have noticed that she is too small for her age, and may be suffering fron neglect. I'd wonder how much attention is being paid to the children overall. Can your son visit the sitter unannounced?  If at all possible, someone needs to look into that situation also. Maybe the snacks she's getting there are not nutritious either.

Thank goodness the baby has a Dad and grandparents looking out for her, since her Mom seems to be unable to be the parent she once was. She's lucky to have you looking out for her as much as you can.

[Angiex911dsptchr]

Glad to hear  your grandaughter has a dr appt.
18 pds for a 2 yr old isnt right,  IMO.  
  I hope you are able to attend the babys Dr appt !!!!

[Sam]

katys Mom please keep us updated on what the DR. Says.

[Seamonkey]

KatyMom -
 I noticed this thread a few days ago while at my Mom's but wanted to wait until I had my own Id to respond, then for some reason I couldn't find the thread lol

 I am glad I did this morning though.

  I find it horrid that a baby should wiegh that little unless, is she small framed anyways? Some babies stay small for a long time. My daughter started 1st grade still wearing 3T clothes, though I am sure you can tell the difference between very small child compaired to bloated out not eating well baby.

 I find subjects of children and such highly sensitive to me so I try not to voice much because I will get on a soapbox, it is upsetting to me at times, but this thread I did need to add something important.

 I do not know if it is true of all states or even all counties within states, but I do know there are instances where the father of the child can NOT get access to the birth certificate. These instances usually are if the father was not officially named on the birth certificate, if no father was named, or if a different father was named. if they were not married at the time and he never signed anything then he may not be on the certificate at all as the father. You may want him to check into that.

 Another important note I wanted to add. People have got to stop feeling like they are butting in when it comes to kids, especially grandparents. Normal people do not butt in unless they have a reason and should not appologize for it. Do you know that even a stranger has the duty to report suspected child neglect or abuse, so if a stranger can do that then a grandparent most certainly has more of a right to protect her own blood.
  Like I said NORMAL people, not people who blow the gun on every little thing or trying to start trouble on another.
 KatysMom, you have every right to protect your blood, you also have every right to kick your son in the butt and tell him to do something if he feels his own daughter is not being cared for, he does not need permission from the mother. Men have got to also start taking responsibity for what they bring in to the world and not count on some of the Mother's they chose to breed with. It is not the baby's fault, they shouldn't have to pay for thier own Mother's downfalls.

 Ok ok..see? Told ya I get sensitive.

 So, KatysMom, I do not want you to feel you are interfering it is your God given right to look out for your own family. In my upbringing ( very matriarcal (sp?) Irish) the grandmother had even the right to tell us how to raise our children and Lord help us if we didn't listen and brought a unbehaved child to thier home let alone thier table. Ewww lol My grandmother has been gone now for 19 years, I am still afraid to go against her wishes. That's the right of all Grandparents to instill so much in us that even after they are gone and we go to do something we first wonder " uhoh what if she will know?" lol

 I do hope I didn't sound harsh in this post anywhere, I didn't mean to sound harsh at all. I just want it all to work out for you I can tell you are concerned and love this baby or you never would have noticed something wrong.

 Sincerely love to you and yours,
 SeaMonkey

[pdh3]

Amen Seamonkey!
Children are close to my heart as well. They can't protect themselves, so we have to do it for them.
It's everyone's job to step up when a child is in trouble. I'm glad to see Katysmom is taking action.

[A's Fever]

Amen Seamonkey!
Children are close to my heart as well. They can't protect themselves, so we have to do it for them.
It's everyone's job to step up when a child is in trouble. I'm glad to see Katysmom is taking action.

pdh3 - O/T, but can we exchange emails?  We can do it thru Klaas, I think.

[klaasend]

pdh3 and A's Fever:

If you both email me at smklaasend@hotmail.com I'll work that out.

[pdh3]

A's - I have sent my email addy to klaas.  
I look forward to talking to you!

[IBE]

Just found this thread... please keep the faith and trust you gut. I think I'll get some Ovaltine for me
Let us know how we can help you, Love, IBE

[Artcolley]

I still order my raw sugar online, I get seasalt too, and Maple Syrup....lets just say being in New England, I've got an endless supply.  It is so worth the expense to get maple syrup, nothing can compare to the taste.  I can get it for about 8.99 a quart at the store, but I've got an "in" with a friend who makes it so we trade favors of sewing/mending  for maple syrup.

We usually tap our trees every Spring and boil down our own maple syrup...YUMMY!!!!!!

[Katysmom]

KatyMom -
 I noticed this thread a few days ago while at my Mom's but wanted to wait until I had my own Id to respond, then for some reason I couldn't find the thread lol

 I am glad I did this morning though.

  I find it horrid that a baby should wiegh that little unless, is she small framed anyways? Some babies stay small for a long time. My daughter started 1st grade still wearing 3T clothes, though I am sure you can tell the difference between very small child compaired to bloated out not eating well baby.

 I find subjects of children and such highly sensitive to me so I try not to voice much because I will get on a soapbox, it is upsetting to me at times, but this thread I did need to add something important.

 I do not know if it is true of all states or even all counties within states, but I do know there are instances where the father of the child can NOT get access to the birth certificate. These instances usually are if the father was not officially named on the birth certificate, if no father was named, or if a different father was named. if they were not married at the time and he never signed anything then he may not be on the certificate at all as the father. You may want him to check into that.

 Another important note I wanted to add. People have got to stop feeling like they are butting in when it comes to kids, especially grandparents. Normal people do not butt in unless they have a reason and should not appologize for it. Do you know that even a stranger has the duty to report suspected child neglect or abuse, so if a stranger can do that then a grandparent most certainly has more of a right to protect her own blood.
  Like I said NORMAL people, not people who blow the gun on every little thing or trying to start trouble on another.
 KatysMom, you have every right to protect your blood, you also have every right to kick your son in the butt and tell him to do something if he feels his own daughter is not being cared for, he does not need permission from the mother. Men have got to also start taking responsibity for what they bring in to the world and not count on some of the Mother's they chose to breed with. It is not the baby's fault, they shouldn't have to pay for thier own Mother's downfalls.

 Ok ok..see? Told ya I get sensitive.

 So, KatysMom, I do not want you to feel you are interfering it is your God given right to look out for your own family. In my upbringing ( very matriarcal (sp?) Irish) the grandmother had even the right to tell us how to raise our children and Lord help us if we didn't listen and brought a unbehaved child to thier home let alone thier table. Ewww lol My grandmother has been gone now for 19 years, I am still afraid to go against her wishes. That's the right of all Grandparents to instill so much in us that even after they are gone and we go to do something we first wonder " uhoh what if she will know?" lol

 I do hope I didn't sound harsh in this post anywhere, I didn't mean to sound harsh at all. I just want it all to work out for you I can tell you are concerned and love this baby or you never would have noticed something wrong.

 Sincerely love to you and yours,
 SeaMonkey

SeaMonkey:  No where in your post did I feel you were sounding harsh in any negative way.  This situation is infuriating!  
I have good news today!  My son went over to 'mom;s' house yesterday afternoon and gave her an ultimatium.  He basically told her that she had the choice to let him take the baby (at least for now) and she can visit anytime she wants, or he would go to a lawyer and get social services involved.  Mom agreed to let my son take the baby to his house!!!!!  He also is going to call today to find out where to take parenting classes.  He's right when he says being a parent is the hardest thing he's ever done and he wants to make sure he's doing it right.  We are still going to the dr. on Friday morning, and yes, I will be going with.  I feel so much better about this whole situation now; things are starting to fall into place.
Thank you for careing.

[pdh3]

That's great news katysmom! I know you are relieved! Your son is a good Dad, and he will do fine. I hope your former daughter-in-law can recover her life, and return to being a good Mom as well. The baby needs them both. Maybe this will wake her up.
Please let us know how the baby is doing. We do care!

[Katysmom]

Just found this thread... please keep the faith and trust you gut. I think I'll get some Ovaltine for me
Let us know how we can help you, Love, IBE

Oh, IBE, you and all the other monkeys have already helped in such a tremendous way!  Just listening to me and offering all the different suggestions have warmed my heart so much.