Kyron Horman, 7 years old, PORTLAND, OR #35 11/11/10 - 11/21/10

[Tracygirl]

I am listening to the PC and he pretty much says the drinking was something that concerned him but he didn't label it alcoholism until he spoke to other people about it. If that is what he says I suppose that is his story.

[sassifrass]

Yes, if those emails are legitimate it is pretty sad that a grown woman could hate a seven year old.  It seems like many parents these days refuse to grow up and take responsibility for the children they brought into this world or for those they accepted responsibility for by marrying someone with children. 

does anyone remember, the post about a woman who hated her stepchild
and couldnt understand why she did exactly, i think there was a link
 to that post, and i think that post had something to due with th
or maybe my memory is just bad

CW, that was on a site called Gardenweb.com. The forum title was called 'I hate my stepson'.

[Tracygirl]

Does anybody know if there is a transcripts of this PC?

[islandmonkey]

Yes, if those emails are legitimate it is pretty sad that a grown woman could hate a seven year old.  It seems like many parents these days refuse to grow up and take responsibility for the children they brought into this world or for those they accepted responsibility for by marrying someone with children. 

does anyone remember, the post about a woman who hated her stepchild
and couldnt understand why she did exactly, i think there was a link
 to that post, and i think that post had something to due with th
or maybe my memory is just bad

CW, that was on a site called Gardenweb.com. The forum title was called 'I hate my stepson'.

Found this one..........believe it or not, there are others 

http://www.thathomesite.com/forums/load/step/msg0619365026002.html?27

[Scatty]

Yes, if those emails are legitimate it is pretty sad that a grown woman could hate a seven year old.  It seems like many parents these days refuse to grow up and take responsibility for the children they brought into this world or for those they accepted responsibility for by marrying someone with children. 

does anyone remember, the post about a woman who hated her stepchild
and couldnt understand why she did exactly, i think there was a link
 to that post, and i think that post had something to due with th
or maybe my memory is just bad

cw618! Yes!! I've been trying to find that link. I'm sure it was Terri. It was a site for step-parents. Was it from iVillage? Does anyone have that link?

 

Found it!

Sassifrass posted it from Hinkymeter via iVillage

http://scaredmonkeys.net/index.php?topic=8338.msg1197678

[Scatty]

Jeez, I'm slow compared to the rest of you!

[Shell]

What is the point of placing blame now on Kaine?  Terri is the unstable one and Terri is the one LE believes harmed Kyron.  Why place blame on Kaine or Desiree?  I'm sure they both feel horrible.

I'm sure they both feel too horrible for words.  I DON'T doubt that for one second.

I'm not placing any blame on Desiree.  I just have a question about Desiree.

Why place blame on Kaine because Terri is the unstable one?  Well, he lived with Terri, he was aware of all the problems. He has scorched the woman to high heavens in court filings.  According to Desiree, he never shared any of that with Desiree.  I knew when I read the filings that Desiree was going to be livid.  She should be!  She has every right! It just hurts so bad to see her so destroyed.

According to Desiree, she never saw any indications of problems with alcohol.  Yes...IMO...there's a problem with Kaine keeping all that to himself..."if true"...when another bio parent is kept in the dark....especially when Desiree discussed Kyron being unhappy and wanting to stay with her.  If Terri was a passing-out drunk several nights a week...why wouldn't Kaine have worked out something with Desiree to ease the burden on Kyron"?  Kyron had to have been stressed out over all of this; yet, everyone says he was a happy little boy and always smiling. We know when a child's homelife isn't going well, it shows up in little ways...usually through school.  I think Kyron loved his mother and wanted to spend more time with her and Kaine wouldn't let it happen...no, it's not an option...even though it would have been better for Kyron - if what Kaine says in his court papers is true. (Repeat: I have no reason to not believe what Kaine said in his filings was true.)

Kaine says in court filings that Terri is a stumbling, speech slurring, passed-out drunk many nights of the week.  He questions her mental health, too.  Yet, he appeared to be fine with having Terri take care of both his children in her condition. 

If I were Desiree and I found out what Kaine has asserted in his court documents about the person who's been taking care of my child...what the "father" says about the person he let that care of my child, I would be upset beyond words.  Now we hear from Desiree that about a year and a half ago she approached Kaine about getting custody of Kyron and Kaine says it's not an option.  She did broach the subject. 

I do wonder why Desiree wasn't more assertive in trying to get custody of Kyron, because Desiree said today that Terri blamed Kyron for all Terri/Kaine's marriage problems and Terri didn't like Kyron and Kyron was unhappy, too.  Now...IMO...it's Desiree's business as to why she didn't go to court and fight for custody. 

It's just a crying shame to hear about all of this now because where Desiree was already in a fragile state....now that Kaine's court filings have been made public...can only make Desiree's mind set soooo much worse.  It's too sad for words.

And, Kaine...while I DO have deep sympathy for him because his son is missing...immense sympathy...I can't help but wonder about why he wouldn't even discuss with Desiree of her having custody of Kyron...or at least a little more custody ( some sort of compromise maybe) when Kaine KNEW what kind of home life Kyron was living (if everything in Kaine's court filings is true and I have no reason to believe it's not)...Kaine portrays a picture of a person (Terri) who should NEVER be left to take care of his son...especially if she's got any mental problems, is a passing-out nightly drunk, etc. 

According to Desiree, Kaine NEVER relayed any problems to her...he wouldn't...he didn't want to lose custody of Kyron.  However, does it mean that Kaine acted in the best interest of Kyron?  Well, that's a good question...IMO.

And....now....why would Terri do anything with Kyron on June 4....just when Kyron was getting ready to go stay with his mom for the summer...just when Kyron was going to be out of Terri's life for a while?  Huh??

I am speculating here...but I think Kyron had been through, seen and heard a lot and had plenty to tell his Mom. He would have plenty of time on summer break to have quality time, long chats with his Mom.

Seems to me Kaine put other issues before his son's happiness. He wanted his son with him, and not give in to Desirees desire to have custody and Kyrons wanting to be with his mom. That happens all the time in custody situations. For Kaine to acknowledge and admit TH had a serious problem meant admitting he made serious mistakes. Well his son is missing and he can't avoid the reality now. Maybe Desiree did not have the money to go through a legal fight...who knows??? why she didn't push for it but I am sure she had her reasons.

And what was Kaine doing on those nights Terri was passing out? I have no idea but he might have had a few himself, maybe he could handle it. *shrugs Maybe he was an enabler. It is a crying shame somebody did not step in and take that sweet little boy out of an environment where that woman despised him. Time will tell if she did the unthinkable or not, but in my mind, hating a little innocent boy and making his life miserable is unthinkable enough.

[Tracygirl]

Yes, if those emails are legitimate it is pretty sad that a grown woman could hate a seven year old.  It seems like many parents these days refuse to grow up and take responsibility for the children they brought into this world or for those they accepted responsibility for by marrying someone with children. 

does anyone remember, the post about a woman who hated her stepchild
and couldnt understand why she did exactly, i think there was a link
 to that post, and i think that post had something to due with th
or maybe my memory is just bad

CW, that was on a site called Gardenweb.com. The forum title was called 'I hate my stepson'.

Found this one..........believe it or not, there are others 

http://www.thathomesite.com/forums/load/step/msg0619365026002.html?27

Yikes that's terrible stuff!

[islandmonkey]

What is the point of placing blame now on Kaine?  Terri is the unstable one and Terri is the one LE believes harmed Kyron.  Why place blame on Kaine or Desiree?  I'm sure they both feel horrible.

I'm sure they both feel too horrible for words.  I DON'T doubt that for one second.

I'm not placing any blame on Desiree.  I just have a question about Desiree.

Why place blame on Kaine because Terri is the unstable one?  Well, he lived with Terri, he was aware of all the problems. He has scorched the woman to high heavens in court filings.  According to Desiree, he never shared any of that with Desiree.  I knew when I read the filings that Desiree was going to be livid.  She should be!  She has every right! It just hurts so bad to see her so destroyed.

According to Desiree, she never saw any indications of problems with alcohol.  Yes...IMO...there's a problem with Kaine keeping all that to himself..."if true"...when another bio parent is kept in the dark....especially when Desiree discussed Kyron being unhappy and wanting to stay with her.  If Terri was a passing-out drunk several nights a week...why wouldn't Kaine have worked out something with Desiree to ease the burden on Kyron"?  Kyron had to have been stressed out over all of this; yet, everyone says he was a happy little boy and always smiling. We know when a child's homelife isn't going well, it shows up in little ways...usually through school.  I think Kyron loved his mother and wanted to spend more time with her and Kaine wouldn't let it happen...no, it's not an option...even though it would have been better for Kyron - if what Kaine says in his court papers is true. (Repeat: I have no reason to not believe what Kaine said in his filings was true.)

Kaine says in court filings that Terri is a stumbling, speech slurring, passed-out drunk many nights of the week.  He questions her mental health, too.  Yet, he appeared to be fine with having Terri take care of both his children in her condition. 

If I were Desiree and I found out what Kaine has asserted in his court documents about the person who's been taking care of my child...what the "father" says about the person he let that care of my child, I would be upset beyond words.  Now we hear from Desiree that about a year and a half ago she approached Kaine about getting custody of Kyron and Kaine says it's not an option.  She did broach the subject. 

I do wonder why Desiree wasn't more assertive in trying to get custody of Kyron, because Desiree said today that Terri blamed Kyron for all Terri/Kaine's marriage problems and Terri didn't like Kyron and Kyron was unhappy, too.  Now...IMO...it's Desiree's business as to why she didn't go to court and fight for custody. 

It's just a crying shame to hear about all of this now because where Desiree was already in a fragile state....now that Kaine's court filings have been made public...can only make Desiree's mind set soooo much worse.  It's too sad for words.

And, Kaine...while I DO have deep sympathy for him because his son is missing...immense sympathy...I can't help but wonder about why he wouldn't even discuss with Desiree of her having custody of Kyron...or at least a little more custody ( some sort of compromise maybe) when Kaine KNEW what kind of home life Kyron was living (if everything in Kaine's court filings is true and I have no reason to believe it's not)...Kaine portrays a picture of a person (Terri) who should NEVER be left to take care of his son...especially if she's got any mental problems, is a passing-out nightly drunk, etc. 

According to Desiree, Kaine NEVER relayed any problems to her...he wouldn't...he didn't want to lose custody of Kyron.  However, does it mean that Kaine acted in the best interest of Kyron?  Well, that's a good question...IMO.

And....now....why would Terri do anything with Kyron on June 4....just when Kyron was getting ready to go stay with his mom for the summer...just when Kyron was going to be out of Terri's life for a while?  Huh??

I am speculating here...but I think Kyron had been through, seen and heard a lot and had plenty to tell his Mom. He would have plenty of time on summer break to have quality time, long chats with his Mom.

Seems to me Kaine put other issues before his son's happiness. He wanted his son with him, and not give in to Desirees desire to have custody and Kyrons wanting to be with his mom. That happens all the time in custody situations. For Kaine to acknowledge and admit TH had a serious problem meant admitting he made serious mistakes. Well his son is missing and he can't avoid the reality now. Maybe Desiree did not have the money to go through a legal fight...who knows??? why she didn't push for it but I am sure she had her reasons.

And what was Kaine doing on those nights Terri was passing out? I have no idea but he might have had a few himself, maybe he could handle it. *shrugs Maybe he was an enabler. It is a crying shame somebody did not step in and take that sweet little boy out of an environment where that woman despised him. Time will tell if she did the unthinkable or not, but in my mind, hating a little innocent boy and making his life miserable is unthinkable enough.

You brought out a question I previously asked when I read whe was passed out drunk on the couch and Kitty was up extremely late playing in front of the TV (paraphrasing). I would have taken Kitty and put her in a crib by the bed directly beside me so she couldn't go get her again, that would have put her on a schedule which he states she wasn't on and made her less fussy. Obviously the marriage was strained beyond repair and had been for a while, so many times the functioning parent has to pick up the slack in situations like where one is drunk, drugged, passed out for "whatever" reason. As for the rest of your post I sadly agree

[Tracygirl]

Taking from the previous post...

http://www.thathomesite.com/forums/load/step/msg011826118329.html?60
Approximately 3/4’s of the way down the page a post by “stepmom2kids” posted on Saturday, March 13, 2010 at 18:35:

    I hate my step kid too. Its not pleasant to think of your husband with another woman making babies, much less having to care for them yourself as a free babysitter, and all the bull that comes with it. Out in the wild, hippos, lions and various other mammals will kill these offspring. I can’t stand my step kid, and he lives with us Frown
    Anyways, if I didn’t know him I’d say he’s a very sweet kid, that has a speech disorder/learning disorder, and as long as I wouldn’t have to be around him for extended periods of time, I’d like him, or be indifferent. But since he’s my step kid and I’m his main caretaker, I harbor a lot of resentment, that I worry may harm my health carrying all of this secret hate around, or that it will come around band bite me in the ass somehow later on. It is very unnatural having step kids, very unnatural to love them, it goes against nature is how it feels anyway.  I have often wished he’d get out of my life, but we can’t afford to pay child support and I have my own daughter to worry about. If we pay more than we can afford each month, how am I going to take care of my own daughter? That would agonize me much more than gritting my teeth everyday and enduring my stepson’s presence. I too would get up and do the gig if I only had to have him 3weeks out of the year. I used to wish that he would choke to death, and one day at a buffet it actually almost happened, man, did I regret that wish, I cried so much, I felt so sorry for his helpless little face as he chocked for air. I couldn’t have lived with the guilt if he’s dad wouldn’t of been there to save his life. Now I just wish he’d get abducted by aliens or something, Just kidding. He’s okay sometimes, but usually talks like a +++++ behind his years. I think he has some kind of learning disability that makes him very good with numbers, but a social +++++ (in my spiteful opinion). According to the dad he is a genius…Pff.. HAHA! What happened to me, I used to be nice, I still am a very nice person, it was normal for close friends to call me one of the nicest, accepting friends, accepting and befriending anyone for who they were. But being a step mom has brought out the worst in me, and is certainly the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I feel like Angelina Jolie in that movie where the police give her a kid that is not hers and he’s calling her “mom”, she throws a pan at the wall and shrieks, “I’m NOT YOUR MOTHER, DON’T CALL ME THAT!!!”. That’s what I want to do when he calls me mom. Instead I shutter inside, and on the outside, I smile sweetly and say, Yes? This is what my life will be from now on because I married a good guy who already had a kid.
 
 
 

[Shell]

I have not read the above link yet...but I have to say, you take an alcoholic woman and put her on the computer late at night and just imagine what she "shares". BUI...I learned that term right here on Scared Monkeys  Well men too for that matter.

Now I am going to the link to see what you all are talking about.

[Scatty]

I really think this is from TH, with some lies thrown in to make it a more compelling, sympathetic (she thinks!) story.


RE: Can't Accept My Stepson  clip this post email this post what is this?
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Posted by stepmom2kids (My Page) on Sat, Mar 13, 10 at 18:35

I hate my step kid too. Its not pleasant to think of your husband with another woman making babies, much less having to care for them yourself as a free babysitter, and all the bull that comes with it. Out in the wild, hippos, lions and various other mammals will kill these offspring. I can't stand my step kid, and he lives with us
Anyways, if I didn't know him I'd say he's a very sweet kid, that has a speech disorder/learning disorder, and as long as I wouldn't have to be around him for extended periods of time, I'd like him, or be indifferent. But since he's my step kid and I�m his main caretaker, I harbor a lot of resentment, that I worry may harm my health carrying all of this secret hate around, or that it will come around band bite me in the ass somehow later on. It is very unnatural having step kids, very unnatural to love them, it goes against nature is how it feels anyway. I have often wished he�d get out of my life, but we can�t afford to pay child support and I have my own daughter to worry about. If we pay more than we can afford each month, how am I going to take care of my own daughter? That would agonize me much more than gritting my teeth everyday and enduring my stepson�s presence. I too would get up and do the gig if I only had to have him 3weeks out of the year. I used to wish that he would choke to death, and one day at a buffet it actually almost happened, man, did I regret that wish, I cried so much, I felt so sorry for his helpless little face as he chocked for air. I couldn�t have lived with the guilt if he�s dad wouldn�t of been there to save his life. Now I just wish he�d get abducted by aliens or something, Just kidding. He's okay sometimes, but usually talks like a +++++ behind his years. I think he has some kind of learning disability that makes him very good with numbers, but a social +++++ (in my spiteful opinion). According to the dad he is a genius...Pff.. HAHA! What happened to me, I used to be nice, I still am a very nice person, it was normal for close friends to call me one of the nicest, accepting friends, accepting and befriending anyone for who they were. But being a step mom has brought out the worst in me, and is certainly the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I feel like Angelina Jolie in that movie where the police give her a kid that is not hers and he�s calling her "mom", she throws a pan at the wall and shrieks, "I�m NOT YOUR MOTHER, DON�T CALL ME THAT!!!". That�s what I want to do when he calls me mom. Instead I shutter inside, and on the outside, I smile sweetly and say, Yes? This is what my life will be from now on because I married a good guy who already had a kid. 

http://www.thathomesite.com/forums/load/step/msg011826118329.html?60

[Scatty]

Sorry monkeys and TG, you beat me to it. Will I ever be first with anything??

[no rose colored glasses]

With all the step moms there are across the world, this could have been written by a great number of women. Pathetic for sure, maybe something that should have been said to a therapist instead of posting it on the internet.

[Tracygirl]

Sorry monkeys and TG, you beat me to it. Will I ever be first with anything??

Sorry scatty, didn't mean to step on your toes. I just posted from your post, so thank you for finding the post.

It fits that it is Terri but unfortunately it could be just another POS step parents. I do wonder if this posting prompted an email. Could this be apart of the emails LE showed Desiree?

[Tracygirl]

With all the step moms there are across the world, this could have been written by a great number of women. Pathetic for sure, maybe something that should have been said to a therapist instead of posting it on the internet.

I don't understand why it ever comes as a surprise to anybody who is thinking about marrying or living with somebody with kids that the kids sort of hang around some times! Geez! 

[islandmonkey]

With all the step moms there are across the world, this could have been written by a great number of women. Pathetic for sure, maybe something that should have been said to a therapist instead of posting it on the internet.

No doubt, and as a stepmother I LOVE my boys....I was going to adopt the youngest who is now almost 24 but he didn't want to move to Florida and away from his friends, but when he is on leave from Iraq or on leave from base, Thanksgiving and Christmas he is here and I feel blessed to have them both So, it's incredibly disturbing to find so many post that I wonder why someone isn't monitoring those sites....ugg, I am sure they prolly couldn't do much, but they most definitely need therapy ASAP, and that is also what I think about those emails and why someone didn't confront KH, DY and TH and insist on therapy. That specific post TG and Scatty found in that link sounds so much like TH and the child support part among all the rest makes me physically sick to my stomach

[Tracygirl]

With all the step moms there are across the world, this could have been written by a great number of women. Pathetic for sure, maybe something that should have been said to a therapist instead of posting it on the internet.

No doubt, and as a stepmother I LOVE my boys....I was going to adopt the youngest who is now almost 24 but he didn't want to move to Florida and away from his friends, but when he is on leave from Iraq or on leave from base, Thanksgiving and Christmas he is here and I feel blessed to have them both So, it's incredibly disturbing to find so many post that I wonder why someone isn't monitoring those sites....ugg, I am sure they prolly couldn't do much, but they most definitely need therapy ASAP, and that is also what I think about those emails and why someone didn't confront KH, DY and TH and insist on therapy. That specific post TG and Scatty found in that link sounds so much like TH and the child support part among all the rest makes me physically sick to my stomach

I have step daughters, I consider them to be my children. 

[O4Bull]

Carla Castano at KOIN has been tweeting that Kaine is going to meet with reporters this a.m. at the wall of hope, and to watch KOIN News Now to find out why, but when I go to the KOIN website, I can't find anything about it.

http://twitter.com/#!/CarlaKOIN
CarlaKOIN Carla Castaño
Kyron Horman's dad meeting reporters at Wall of Hope today. Find out why on KOIN News Now at 6am.

Anyone know what it's about?

I had heard this would happen today, but I never heard or saw a scheduled time. One source (forgot which) said no new details are expected.

After Desiree's tirade this morning, this should be interesting. It will be harder for him to keep his personal life out of news on the search for Kyron.

Respectfully Grey, I absolutely think that is the wrong description to us for Desiree' interview, and frankly it just ticks me off. She's in a lot of pain. 

Respectfully, sassifrass, please call the vocabulary police or post a list of words I am allowed to use in order to keep you happy. We are here to please you.

I know she is in a lot of pain, and I am glad she was able to vent with a lot of reasons about why she is upset about Terri. It has been obvious that she has held back before, but all of this new information is too much for her to remain silent.

I'm waaaaay behind and will never be able to read every post, but after reading several of your snarky posts grey, I just couldn't take it anymore.  Add me to the list of posters who are offended by you.  AGAIN.

[Shell]

I really think this is from TH, with some lies thrown in to make it a more compelling, sympathetic (she thinks!) story.


RE: Can't Accept My Stepson  clip this post email this post what is this?
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Posted by stepmom2kids (My Page) on Sat, Mar 13, 10 at 18:35

I hate my step kid too. Its not pleasant to think of your husband with another woman making babies, much less having to care for them yourself as a free babysitter, and all the bull that comes with it. Out in the wild, hippos, lions and various other mammals will kill these offspring. I can't stand my step kid, and he lives with us
Anyways, if I didn't know him I'd say he's a very sweet kid, that has a speech disorder/learning disorder, and as long as I wouldn't have to be around him for extended periods of time, I'd like him, or be indifferent. But since he's my step kid and I�m his main caretaker, I harbor a lot of resentment, that I worry may harm my health carrying all of this secret hate around, or that it will come around band bite me in the ass somehow later on. It is very unnatural having step kids, very unnatural to love them, it goes against nature is how it feels anyway. I have often wished he�d get out of my life, but we can�t afford to pay child support and I have my own daughter to worry about. If we pay more than we can afford each month, how am I going to take care of my own daughter? That would agonize me much more than gritting my teeth everyday and enduring my stepson�s presence. I too would get up and do the gig if I only had to have him 3weeks out of the year. I used to wish that he would choke to death, and one day at a buffet it actually almost happened, man, did I regret that wish, I cried so much, I felt so sorry for his helpless little face as he chocked for air. I couldn�t have lived with the guilt if he�s dad wouldn�t of been there to save his life. Now I just wish he�d get abducted by aliens or something, Just kidding. He's okay sometimes, but usually talks like a +++++ behind his years. I think he has some kind of learning disability that makes him very good with numbers, but a social +++++ (in my spiteful opinion). According to the dad he is a genius...Pff.. HAHA! What happened to me, I used to be nice, I still am a very nice person, it was normal for close friends to call me one of the nicest, accepting friends, accepting and befriending anyone for who they were. But being a step mom has brought out the worst in me, and is certainly the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I feel like Angelina Jolie in that movie where the police give her a kid that is not hers and he�s calling her "mom", she throws a pan at the wall and shrieks, "I�m NOT YOUR MOTHER, DON�T CALL ME THAT!!!". That�s what I want to do when he calls me mom. Instead I shutter inside, and on the outside, I smile sweetly and say, Yes? This is what my life will be from now on because I married a good guy who already had a kid. 

http://www.thathomesite.com/forums/load/step/msg011826118329.html?60

What makes you really think this is Terri H? You are kidding, right? It could be her, and it could be a lot of people.