Kyron Horman, 7 years old, PORTLAND, OR #35 11/11/10 - 11/21/10

[starwynn]

]I'm sorry that you lost your mom to suicide   

Well, thank you.  It was one heck of a rough time (before and after), but I was at least blessed with answers.  Some people who lose their loved ones to something tragic (like all the families that the monkeys seek answers for on this board) never get any answers, never understand, and never are given any sense of peace.   

So thank you again, and I'm so humbled and glad to be on a board where people really do try to find answers and make sense of things! 

[can]

I just wish Kaine would have shown more empathy for Desiree's feelings.

The "event" statement sounds like something his therapist might say so maybe that's where it came from.  JMO

[can]

]I'm sorry that you lost your mom to suicide   

Well, thank you.  It was one heck of a rough time (before and after), but I was at least blessed with answers.  Some people who lose their loved ones to something tragic (like all the families that the monkeys seek answers for on this board) never get any answers, never understand, and never are given any sense of peace.   

So thank you again, and I'm so humbled and glad to be on a board where people really do try to find answers and make sense of things! 

starwyn, I'm so sorry you lost your Mom.

[starwynn]

A few of you have sent condolences, and now I'm blushing.  Thank you.  This really is an amazing board.  Funny thing is - you all can be so loving and sweet, but woooo when it comes time to be angry    y'all get... well as angry as I do about these things!   

You know, I've been hashing over these videos for a while - Kyron, the short time of Zahra's stuff (still ongoing), little Haleigh, etc... and wondered "why aren't people asking more questions, like (____fill in blank with your favorite question_____). When I found this board, I realized - some of you ARE asking those questions!  Phew!  I thought it was just me!

Thanks again, all.  I hope that we all can get some answers or at least, as my friend put it, "tug at the fabric of the universe" enough collectively that maybe answers will come.

[starwynn]

I do have to admit that hearing what she did about the drunken stepmom *secondhand* would have royally ticked me off.  When she said that's how she learned it, I cringed.  Ouch.  She's right - Kaine is indeed making some bad decisions, and that was surely one of them.  Searching for my son, I sure would want to treat the people Kyron's side with the exact same respect as I myself would wish to be treated.

I also have to nod my head yes to the drugs and flattening of personality and feelings.  Still - Kaine - it's the holidays.  EVERYthing is going to *feel* worse now.  Don't make things worse than they already are.
 

[cw618]

"I’m not going to hold myself hostage for this event that happened to him.”     No matter how many times I read that sentence it makes no sense to me. I don't think that I have ever heard a parent say such a thing when there child is missing.

I have only seen broken parents....Not sure where Kaine is coming from with this. I mean, glad to know he is not ready to jump off the next bridge, don't get me wrong, but some of the statements are a bit off. If another parent in another thread had said these words, not sure how much support they would have.

---------
Sometimes the word "hostage" is used metaphorically, for example: "The school did not buy the land because its headmaster missed the train to the meeting because of a road traffic accident; the whole matter thus proved to be hostage to one misbehaving carriage horse

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hostage
---------
not sure what KH and his therapist have accomplished with KH emotional
state of being, but it sounds like KH has taken on a new outlook, not sure
that, could mean several things,like maybe he feels with more pushing, in
the direction of TH, he could get the results he is looking for, or he is
maybe going to hire a PI,start some work of his own
i think he is saying im tired of feeling helpless in this situation, and
 he perceives the slow mo, of the situation,as a stalemate. or he could
be feeling empowered. JMO

havent read back yet,i see something about unemployment
link to oregon info
http://www.employment.oregon.gov/EMPLOY/UI/docs/UI_forms/uipub_350-e_1009.pdf

[no rose colored glasses]

cw, I see what you are saying with the word hostage, I still see it as being not the best choice of words to express yourself.

[hellokitty]

 

Let's see .  People complained when they didn't go to the media right away.

Then people complained because they are getting too much media.

These are real people and their lives are out for the world to see.

The divorce.  The weird going's on.

Who among us could stand up to such scrutiny or would want to?

We know more about their lives than about most movie stars.

And the words they say?

Who of us could stand up to scrutiny of our words, especially when our lives have been turned upside down.

Everything Kaine believed seems to be false.

And his son is missing.

Who could live up to the scrutiny in the most horrible of a parent's nightmare?

[no rose colored glasses]

We know more about their lives than about most movie stars.   Well actually I think we know more about movie star's lives, at least I do because I enjoy reading those things. I don't care to know really about their lives, only if their lives and their choices have to do with Kyron's disappearance. It is up to them when they go in front of the media or not, but the choice of statements I feel were hurtful to Desiree, and they would not be the kind of words that I would use.

[monchichi]

Well said, Hello Kitty.

[Puzzler]

Why does he have to say anyhting except "  Kyron is still missing ". I miss him, love him, blah blah. 
Maybe he could keep some of this between him and his therapist. If those are his feelings, he is entitled to them, they are his feelings and he owns them. Desiree has feelings too. And why is this turning into this ? Not here on these boards, but why does Kaine have the bullhorn all the time.   
Ed Smart probaly has alot of guilt for not having the alarm on. I say probably because Ed Smart did not tell me about all of his feelings. 

Hmmm...I'm beginning to think that the more Kaine talks, the better.  We're learning more about him lately by his talking that in all the previous months.

[Puzzler]

Why does he have to say anyhting except "  Kyron is still missing ". I miss him, love him, blah blah. 
Maybe he could keep some of this between him and his therapist. If those are his feelings, he is entitled to them, they are his feelings and he owns them. Desiree has feelings too. And why is this turning into this ? Not here on these boards, but why does Kaine have the bullhorn all the time.   
Ed Smart probaly has alot of guilt for not having the alarm on. I say probably because Ed Smart did not tell me about all of his feelings. 

I agree some of this needs to be said only to the therapist.

Let him talk...maybe some information will come to light that needs to be known.

[Puzzler]

I don't consider those emails " evidence ". They show Terri's state of mind and those who don't like her will like her even less and assign motive, but they are not evidence. And, why were those emails given to Desiree to read ? Did it do her any good ? Did it help find Kyron ?
..

I don't like the way LE has played their cards "via" the grieving family...LE know Desiree would come out with this.  I do NOT like the way LE has consistently let the family do their talking.  Dang it!  If LE has some thing to say or some button to push - man up and get out there and make an appeal to the public. 

[Puzzler]

Yes ... me again.  I follow and lurk ... lurk and follow.  Hi my lovely monkeys 

I just have to say that I'm a little disgusted at KH comments.  Even while giving him leeway for what he's been through and losing a son ... his comments just turn my stomach.

The whole ... if we can't accept and learn from our past mistakes ... we are destined to repeat them ... comes to mind.

Hope he can accept at least enough responsibility ... and make better choices when he chooses Kitty's new step-mother.  And not allow a drunk pathological liar to raise her.

Hi Newfie, I can't argue, it baffles me some of the things he said, poor choice of statements, and this statement "I’m not going to hold myself hostage for this event that happened to him" makes me very upset, seems so disconnected. Hopefully he didn't mean it to sound that way.

It could be that we're just beginning to see how Kaine is....before now (he's just been speaking out lately) we only saw a very structured Kaine who would answer questions he had received in advance.  Let's face it...we really only knew Kaine as Kyron's father...not Kaine himself and this is the first we're getting to know about him IMO.

[Puzzler]

"I’m not going to hold myself hostage for this event that happened to him.”     No matter how many times I read that sentence it makes no sense to me. I don't think that I have ever heard a parent say such a thing when there child is missing.

I have only seen broken parents....Not sure where Kaine is coming from with this. I mean, glad to know he is not ready to jump off the next bridge, don't get me wrong, but some of the statements are a bit off. If another parent in another thread had said these words, not sure how much support they would have.

His comment seems out-of-joint to you "because" it is! 

[Puzzler]

cbs interview

http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=7070091n#ixzz15js8qnj8

Kaine says directly to Kyron:  "home is safe.  It is just Kiara and me"

sigh

Which begs the question, if Kyron happened to be found alive I'm not certain that he should be at Kaine's......sorry, JMO but his affadavit about TH passing out VISIBLY drunk, staggering, slurring her speech, leaving a toddler crawling on the floor until the wee hours of the morning (she could have choked on anything) being to rigid or excessive when punishing him, and again IMO a lack of engagement in everyday family life/cues from Kyron make me think a guardian ad litem should be appointed. Granted we know nothing of Desiree's home life, but shouldn't that be a decision for the court to put Kyron's best interest ahead of anything?

I really wish Kyron and Kitty had GAL's

I wouldn't be surprised if in the near future there's a guardian ad litem for Kiara.

[Puzzler]

cw, I see what you are saying with the word hostage, I still see it as being not the best choice of words to express yourself.

 "I’m not going to hold myself hostage for this event that happened to him"

IMO, IMO, IMO: Sounds disconnected, sounds selfish, sounds like Kaine is more concerned
about thinking about himself and how this is affecting Kaine than being concerned for the
"event" (strange word to use) that happened to him (can't even say Kyron...he didn't use
the word Kyron in his note to Intel employees either).

There is a disconnect.  It does seem strange.  It does make me think about his words.

[Puzzler]

Let's see .  People complained when they didn't go to the media right away.

Then people complained because they are getting too much media.

These are real people and their lives are out for the world to see.

The divorce.  The weird going's on.

Who among us could stand up to such scrutiny or would want to?

We know more about their lives than about most movie stars.

And the words they say?

Who of us could stand up to scrutiny of our words, especially when our lives have been turned upside down.

Everything Kaine believed seems to be false.

And his son is missing.

Who could live up to the scrutiny in the most horrible of a parent's nightmare?

From the beginning it's been odd:

It was odd that Kaine didn't want to talk to the public for a number of
days in the beginning (five days, I believe).

It was odd that Kaine tried to control the press and wouldn't even talk
to major press members because they weren't playing like "team players.

It is odd now to hear the words that are being delivered by Kaine.

[nicubird]

Let's see .  People complained when they didn't go to the media right away.

Then people complained because they are getting too much media.

These are real people and their lives are out for the world to see.

The divorce.  The weird going's on.

Who among us could stand up to such scrutiny or would want to?

We know more about their lives than about most movie stars.

And the words they say?

Who of us could stand up to scrutiny of our words, especially when our lives have been turned upside down.

Everything Kaine believed seems to be false.

And his son is missing.

Who could live up to the scrutiny in the most horrible of a parent's nightmare?

[Kat_Gram]

Kaine could not be thinking clearly. How could he ? Who could be in this situation ?
He needs to stop with his hammering on TMH in the divorce and elsewhere.
His function IMO is to keep the search alive, do the dirty laundry in the privacy of his own home and with his therapist. Taking snipes at TMH in public, well it just makes him look bad.
I have no clue what LE is doing, maybe they don't know either. That GJ  ?? they didn't make any arrest for the MFH, how long can that GJ sit with either a yes or a no ?
..
He has to think about a. ) why am I in front of this camera ?
KYRON.   
I don't even know if making any appeal to anyone who took this boy would do any good, but maybe someone has one piece of info that might ding something in their brain, like the details that are on the posters LE put up, the vehicle, where she was seen, etc.