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Author Topic: Kyron Horman, 7 years old, PORTLAND, OR #36 11/21/10 - 12/05/10  (Read 181134 times)
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can
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« Reply #300 on: November 26, 2010, 08:26:42 AM »

Prayers for Kyron and his family.
 an angelic monkey
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Lazydog1
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« Reply #301 on: November 26, 2010, 08:43:45 AM »

With all the talk of how professional Kaine is/was, and how Terri was a stay home Mom who only had to concern herself for the raising of the chilren and the daily functioning of the home? Then, why according to various sources, which I cannot quote (I'm away from my computer), that Terri was obligated to pay Kaine 1,000.00 per month in addition to raising the children maintaining the home on a daily basis.

BBM MK those are Terri's words in one of her emails sent to someone. We do not know this is the truth. Think Pathological liar. At this point I believe very little of what she says that makes people pity her.

All of the Kaine bashing, Kick him while he's down is very sad.

Sassi ITA.
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It is my prayer that Kyron be found and return home. Of course like everyone else I want him found alive but feel his parents need peace and closure. May this happen before Spring 2011.
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« Reply #302 on: November 26, 2010, 08:54:30 AM »

Alcoholisim: Imagine someone standing in front of an on coming truck-everyday.
Enabling: When you see someone standing in front of an on coming truck and you push them out of the way and you get hit instead.

I've booked in people who couldn't even sit in a chair who were DUI. I've seen people dead from alcohol poisoning.
Be safe, don't be a statistic. Drink responsibly.

MK I had asked a while back if you were in LE and I never saw an answer (If you did answer I apologize) but this post kinda tells me.  I enjoy seeing you on here and watching your Son at the bottom.  Are you active, retired? Thank you for serving our community day in and day out!  LE is usually not thanked enough.


                                                                                       
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melisb
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« Reply #303 on: November 26, 2010, 09:10:39 AM »

One more thing I wanted to say before I forget (since my brain is fried from work) is, I wonder if it's a possibility that Terri sent James away because he noticed her alcoholism, passing out drunk on the couch, slurred speech and staggering gait.......sometimes kids are more in tuned than adults and pick up one specific behavoirs, even slight changes......I know my son knows ASAP if something is bothering me or I am keeping something from him. Just throught I'd toss it out there, and prolly not the case, but I can see it as he could have confronted her and she knew it was true and promised to do better (knowing she prolly wouldn't be able to IF she is an acoholic), and sent him away to avoid her son seeing her as a lush

Hey fellow Florida gal, y'all look bee-u-ti-ful as do ALL our wonderful Monkeys!  About sending James away...since the supposed RS affair was late last year and a poss 911 call in Dec. and then calling LE on RS and them going to his home (wife found out???) it might just be that RS threatened to do some kind of harm to HER family and TH may have thought James was first in line to be harmed?  It makes a little sense.  I bet she never dreamed her former flame would come after Kyron.  He isn't her child.  James just might have known RS if he ever did come to the house and "work". But then again, taking her child wouldn't hurt her marriage like her lover taking her husbands child.
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fatcatlurker
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« Reply #304 on: November 26, 2010, 09:21:13 AM »

Alcoholisim: Imagine someone standing in front of an on coming truck-everyday.
Enabling: When you see someone standing in front of an on coming truck and you push them out of the way and you get hit instead. I've booked in people who couldn't even sit in a chair who were DUI. I've seen people dead from alcohol poisoning.
Be safe, don't be a statistic. Drink responsibly.

I disagree, enabling is simply standing on the sideline and watching what you've stated above and it doesn't just take place with alcoholism.  Humans enable other humans in so many ways in all aspects of life.

A Martyr is one who will do what you've stated above.
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Nana29
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« Reply #305 on: November 26, 2010, 09:33:56 AM »

Alcoholisim: Imagine someone standing in front of an on coming truck-everyday.
Enabling: When you see someone standing in front of an on coming truck and you push them out of the way and you get hit instead. I've booked in people who couldn't even sit in a chair who were DUI. I've seen people dead from alcohol poisoning.
Be safe, don't be a statistic. Drink responsibly.

I disagree, enabling is simply standing on the sideline and watching what you've stated above and it doesn't just take place with alcoholism.  Humans enable other humans in so many ways in all aspects of life.

A Martyr is one who will do what you've stated above.


I guess that makes me both. BBM  I agree. Sometimes Usually it is easier to see after the fact, we can only pray that it becomes clear sooner. In my experience it has been "too close to the forest to see the trees". When someone else started pruning the branches and clearing the weeds and underbrush, I have had the "aha" moment. Only by the grace of God have we made strides forward. It is an ongoing battle, we are winning...
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« Reply #306 on: November 26, 2010, 09:34:07 AM »

With all the talk of how professional Kaine is/was, and how Terri was a stay home Mom who only had to concern herself for the raising of the chilren and the daily functioning of the home? Then, why according to various sources, which I cannot quote (I'm away from my computer), that Terri was obligated to pay Kaine 1,000.00 per month in addition to raising the children maintaining the home on a daily basis.

The only source for that is Terri herself and personally, I don't buy it.
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« Reply #307 on: November 26, 2010, 10:16:22 AM »

Seamus O'Riley  and Lilian Glass right a blog about other crimes as well. Caylee, Haleigh, and I'm sure others. I suppose some people like their perspective and others don't. It is just their interpretation of things.
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« Reply #308 on: November 26, 2010, 10:17:56 AM »

Geeze I didn't mean to chase anybody off.  I just think rationally with the information the man is being given by LE right up to this past Friday regarding Terri he has to do what he has to do in regards to Kiara.

What if she is guilty? 


I totally agree with your posts. But I sometimes feel that rational and logical go out the window when someone is disliked. I hate to sound like a Kaine Horman cheerleader, but I feel he is getting an unfair tarbrushing. Kaine is disliked by some, perhaps because there may be some projection going on, perhaps some mistaken sympathy for Terri (although I hope there would be no one that could identify with her on this forum!), or some personalizing of the Horman divorce/custody situation, etc. And when more information about Terri trickles out, then this is sneaky LE, 'leaking' info to try to unfairly trap Terri. LE is not on Kaine Horman's payroll. If they thought he was guilty, we'd be hearing a bunch of stuff about him as well; they have no "We hate Terri Horman, just because..." agenda. But... no matter what the facts are, they seem to be ignored or twisted through speculation to villify him further.
It's unavoidable I guess, because we are all entitled to our opinions and foibles, but I don't have to like it. Sad



Thank you for this post. I agree 100%. It has clearly gone way off track in the Kyron forum. It doesn't matter what happens in this case, there are some posters who will find a way to blame Kaine for it. He is a grieving, suffering parent of a missing child, and his pain is no less than Desiree's. This bashing of Kaine all the time is just mean, IMHO.

I think that we should be able to express our thoughts without being called "mean". It is his words that make me not trust him, no one elses but his.



I'm expressing my thoughts....I think it's mean to rake a grieving parent over the coals, and  twist every word he says into something he didn't intend. Some of this stuff  he's being criticized about , that's also a is extremely petty. There have been posters on this forum who have been looking to blame Kaine since the day Kyron went missing. Kaine is NOT a suspect,he never has been a suspect, and he should be treated kindly because he is also a victim, and he is suffering terribly. He is trying to protect Kiara, and he's doing the best he can, I am sure. He is living a nightmare.
In a divorce, the lawyers use strong language and lots of drama to make their case against the other spouse. All of the posters who are calling Kaine out for the words used in the pleadings are wrong. He DID NOT WRITE THOSE WORDS. His attorney did, and thats just how the legal process works. Legal proceedings are really like theater, and attorneys are often acting or exaggerating certain points for their legal strategy.
Kaine has a separate branch of this tragedy unfolding before him even as he has had to deal with a missing Kyron. Of course he's changing his view as he learns more, and he is expressing a different attitude. That makes perfect sense. There's nothing sinister about it.
Before posters start tearing a grieving parent's words apart, maybe the CONTEXT should be considered. Or that the situation is evolving. Everyone does that. People change their ideas about others in their lives as they get more information.

 I really hope he doesn't read here.

I think that so many of us have different views based on our own life experiences. When I met my husband, he was going through an ugly divorce. He was told to ALWAYS tell the truth in his statements and not to exaggerate anything. He spent thousands upon thousands of dollars protecting his children from his ex-wife's new live-in boyfriend, a known alcoholic. This went on for years. His ex would say that her boyfriend no longer drank, no longer drove on a suspended license, blah blah blah. All of which we would prove in court over and over was not true. So, for me, having been on the end of it where we spent money we did not have to protect my husbands children from an alcholic that they were exposed to during her visitation, I have a hard time with parents who look the other way. I am so sorry that Kyron is missing, just as I would be equally sorry if Terri had driven Kyron while drunk and he was killed during a car accident with her while drunk. There comes a time for accountability. My only concern are for the children that are victims, not the parents who put them in a position to be a victim. Children never seem to legally have a voice and there are many of us who speak for the children, even if there are those that want to squelch this voice. JMO
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« Reply #309 on: November 26, 2010, 10:39:54 AM »

You are still not getting it. No one is suggesting that KAINE lied to his lawyers or that he should.I did not even remotely suggest such a thing. I am saying very plainly that it's part of the legal process and that it's the way that LAWYERS word things. Do not twist my words either.

The person who should be held accountable is Terri Moulton Horman. Kaine did not know in advance that she would harm his child. He was blindsided by her duplicity, and he is also a victim.
I do not blame him for trying to help his wife, and for wanting to save his marriage. I blame the appropriate person...Terri.
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« Reply #310 on: November 26, 2010, 11:10:32 AM »

 

I am very confused about the money TH "had" to give Kaine.

I work and my paycheck goes into our bank account.  My hubby works, and his paycheck goes into our bank account.

When I got an inheritance, the money went into our bank account.

So why wouldn't TH's money go into a family bank account?

If she looked at herself as a babysitter, butler, maid, etc, she should have looked elsewhere.  She could have actually been paid a salary.

Did she think that she was earning a salary by doing the things that a mother does?  Did she think then that the rest of the money was fun money only for herself to do with as she wished?

Kaine was supposed to work and all of the money he made went to the family whereas her's does not?.

It sounds like she looked at her marriage as a business arrangement.

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islandmonkey
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« Reply #311 on: November 26, 2010, 11:10:35 AM »

One more thing I wanted to say before I forget (since my brain is fried from work) is, I wonder if it's a possibility that Terri sent James away because he noticed her alcoholism, passing out drunk on the couch, slurred speech and staggering gait.......sometimes kids are more in tuned than adults and pick up one specific behavoirs, even slight changes......I know my son knows ASAP if something is bothering me or I am keeping something from him. Just throught I'd toss it out there, and prolly not the case, but I can see it as he could have confronted her and she knew it was true and promised to do better (knowing she prolly wouldn't be able to IF she is an acoholic), and sent him away to avoid her son seeing her as a lush

Hey fellow Florida gal, y'all look bee-u-ti-ful as do ALL our wonderful Monkeys!  About sending James away...since the supposed RS affair was late last year and a poss 911 call in Dec. and then calling LE on RS and them going to his home (wife found out???) it might just be that RS threatened to do some kind of harm to HER family and TH may have thought James was first in line to be harmed?  It makes a little sense.  I bet she never dreamed her former flame would come after Kyron.  He isn't her child.  James just might have known RS if he ever did come to the house and "work". But then again, taking her child wouldn't hurt her marriage like her lover taking her husbands child.

That very well could be, I was just looking for more alternate theories that might prove the alcohol allegations such as passsing out visibly drunk and the rest, like I said my kids are more perceptive than the adults around me and I was wondering if he had seen this and said something to his mom, she promised to stop and then sent him away since she knew she wasn't going to and didn't want him to see it.....Of course, this is all IF she was a true alcoholic, and literally everything we've heard except Ky is missing, he went missing from school, the texts and email is a he said/she said (well in the case she isn't saying jack shit since she knows she's in deep), but we have NO idea what really went on in that home behind closed doors. But, I did read where Kaine stated yesterday that "Kyron suffered" wrt her punishment.........well, instead of paraphrasing I found it:

http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/11/kyrons_parents_--_kaine_horman.html

In previous interviews, Horman said he learned that Terri Horman secretly drank in 2005 while competing in a bodybuilding contest. She was arrested that year for drunken driving and completed a diversion course. Horman said things were fine after that until Terri Horman gave birth to Kiara in 2008.

But on Monday he indicated that things were not fine.

"I think the alcohol was the tip of the iceberg," he said.

He accused his estranged wife, again, of being a demanding mother and stepmother, carrying out "inappropriate punishment."

"It was excessive in nature," he said, adding that Kyron suffered.

"It is evident the relationship between them was strained," he said


I guess mentally I blocked that last sentence about the suffering, and now I am wondering what led him to this conclusion since Kyron isn't here to tell him, and we know Terri isn't saying jack.....so, was this previously known? OMG~If it was known and nothing was done about it, I think I am going to be physically sick at the thought , such as sweet child and he looked like all he wanted was to love and be loved, and IMO like he was trying so hard to please and children shouldn't have to live that way EVER. WTH is this world coming to???   
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« Reply #312 on: November 26, 2010, 11:25:42 AM »



Island, that took a lot of courage to check your ex out and very clever, too.

And you did do the best thing for your brother.  It's all up to him what happens. 

I can see why your father continues to enable.  I just feel that I might do the same thing.  Although at his age it wouldn't be as bad to leave him to his own devices (your brother).  He has become very adept at living with his issues and knows how to take care of himself, I bet.

It's on the same level as Kaine and Desiree thinking that TH did something to Khron, but yet there is nothing they can do about the fact that she has info.

That would be so incredibly difficult.  I pray for strength and peace for them, as well as for your brother.

Thanks HK, I think I have been following missing and abused cases so long that my antenna is prolly to high, but in this case the knowledge I had learned from reading places like SM helped SOOOO much, so it wasn't really courage as much as I had read about how others had done it (all except the info from the pharmacy), so I already had a template/plan so to speak.

Dad is getting better with my brother and he was grateful I called the police too, and as hard as it is on him I pray he doesn't fall into enabling him again, but you are right about your own kids........very hard call, a spouse IMO is totally different. WRT my brother being edept, he isn't, and that's why he hits rock bottom so often and sometimes I wonder how much further is your rock bottom....what happens when he falls off the wagon is that he calls non-stop and starts crying and saying he loves everyone and how nobody loves him, frankly he sounds suicidal when he gets that way and I think that is why dad is almost killing himself to try and get to him ASAP when these episodes happen, as a parent it has to be the most devastating thing to see your kids go thru. But, even my dad is extremely demanding about who he is around, but I have the only kids so it makes that aspect easier. Thanks for your prayers, I think everyone is praying for a resolution and a successful conviction, wrt thank you for that also

Oh one more thing, I never meant Kaine was an absentee parent literally, I think that he might not have been as tuned it to the red flags and I know many ppl like that, more men than women as generally men are less emotional than women and tend to compartmentalize and think it will get better or I'll fix it and that comes across as detached from the day to day life in the house, not that I thought he shouldn't work. I just wanted to clear that up.....I know many men, and a few women who go thru life with blinders on, makes life easier and I see it more in 2nd and 3rd marriages and especially blended families, they want to not rock the boat too much since there is NO way in hell to make everyone happy. Another reason I will never marry (if ever) until my son is in college, I don't want to risk it and at this point in my life am very happy with just dating, working and having time to enjoy my family.
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« Reply #313 on: November 26, 2010, 11:35:46 AM »



I am very confused about the money TH "had" to give Kaine.

I work and my paycheck goes into our bank account.  My hubby works, and his paycheck goes into our bank account.

When I got an inheritance, the money went into our bank account.

So why wouldn't TH's money go into a family bank account?

If she looked at herself as a babysitter, butler, maid, etc, she should have looked elsewhere.  She could have actually been paid a salary.

Did she think that she was earning a salary by doing the things that a mother does?  Did she think then that the rest of the money was fun money only for herself to do with as she wished?

Kaine was supposed to work and all of the money he made went to the family whereas her's does not?.

It sounds like she looked at her marriage as a business arrangement.



I'm pretty sure I read where he stated last week IIRC that they kept seperate bank accounts, I'm not sure how the money from any of the acct's were divied up or on what, I'd assume since the house was only in his name that he paid the note and insurance etc, I wonder if they had one joint account for general expenses like groceries, kids clothing, school supplies, Dr's appt co-pays and RX....not sure we know, but I only heard about seperate accounts.
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« Reply #314 on: November 26, 2010, 11:38:26 AM »

My husband and I have joint and separate bank accounts. Maybe they had both as well? Maybe having all separate accounts is really a good idea.
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« Reply #315 on: November 26, 2010, 11:49:33 AM »

You are still not getting it. No one is suggesting that KAINE lied to his lawyers or that he should.I did not even remotely suggest such a thing. I am saying very plainly that it's part of the legal process and that it's the way that LAWYERS word things. Do not twist my words either.

The person who should be held accountable is Terri Moulton Horman. Kaine did not know in advance that she would harm his child. He was blindsided by her duplicity, and he is also a victim.
I do not blame him for trying to help his wife, and for wanting to save his marriage. I blame the appropriate person...Terri.
No doubt it certainly looks like Terri had something to do with Kyron's disappearance. But honestly I don't think none of us here know for sure what she did or didn't do. And we sure don't know what was all going on inside that home either. We don't know if anybody was trying to save that marriage at all either. Maybe they were both sick of each other and wanted out. I'm sure most people would never think that a spouse or family member would ever kill anyone, even though red flags are everywhere.
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« Reply #316 on: November 26, 2010, 12:02:56 PM »



I am very confused about the money TH "had" to give Kaine.

I work and my paycheck goes into our bank account.  My hubby works, and his paycheck goes into our bank account.

When I got an inheritance, the money went into our bank account.

So why wouldn't TH's money go into a family bank account?

If she looked at herself as a babysitter, butler, maid, etc, she should have looked elsewhere.  She could have actually been paid a salary.

Did she think that she was earning a salary by doing the things that a mother does?  Did she think then that the rest of the money was fun money only for herself to do with as she wished?

Kaine was supposed to work and all of the money he made went to the family whereas her's does not?.

It sounds like she looked at her marriage as a business arrangement.



BBM even though I think a lot of couples keep their money separate, that is something that makes me go hmmmm, maybe they both thought of the marriage as a business arrangement for some reason......not sure that it helps in finding Kyron, but it would explain a few things......
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« Reply #317 on: November 26, 2010, 12:04:09 PM »

You are still not getting it. No one is suggesting that KAINE lied to his lawyers or that he should.I did not even remotely suggest such a thing. I am saying very plainly that it's part of the legal process and that it's the way that LAWYERS word things. Do not twist my words either.

The person who should be held accountable is Terri Moulton Horman. Kaine did not know in advance that she would harm his child. He was blindsided by her duplicity, and he is also a victim.
I do not blame him for trying to help his wife, and for wanting to save his marriage. I blame the appropriate person...Terri.
No doubt it certainly looks like Terri had something to do with Kyron's disappearance. But honestly I don't think none of us here know for sure what she did or didn't do. And we sure don't know what was all going on inside that home either. We don't know if anybody was trying to save that marriage at all either. Maybe they were both sick of each other and wanted out. I'm sure most people would never think that a spouse or family member would ever kill anyone, even though red flags are everywhere.

ITA NRCG, never in a million yrs would I expect anything to nefarious to happen such as kidnapping or murder, but I guess I am just a worrier since I am a sticker who my kids can ride with, and a lush in the house would be off the list ASAP......even now that my daughter drives, since she is barely 19 and relatively inexperienced, I don't let my son ride with her either unless it's ONLY on the Island which is 4 streets wide, and the area she is allowed to drive in is a 2 mile area that is strictly residential, never near the public beach...... no traffic whatsoever, and the school is 3-4 blocks away and I make her take the least traveled road that is on the gulf OK, I know that sounds extreme but I am just a natural born worrier and I know most kids have a wreck in the first 4 yrs of driving, and it's also IIRC the leading cause of death so I justify my uptight behavoir by reminded myself those statistics. Add alcohol and not a shot in hell he'd ever be in that car. ITA also that we really don't know what was happening in regards to saving the marriage, what goes on behind closed doors in many homes would shock most of us
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« Reply #318 on: November 26, 2010, 12:07:57 PM »

You are still not getting it. No one is suggesting that KAINE lied to his lawyers or that he should.I did not even remotely suggest such a thing. I am saying very plainly that it's part of the legal process and that it's the way that LAWYERS word things. Do not twist my words either.

The person who should be held accountable is Terri Moulton Horman. Kaine did not know in advance that she would harm his child. He was blindsided by her duplicity, and he is also a victim.
I do not blame him for trying to help his wife, and for wanting to save his marriage. I blame the appropriate person...Terri.
No doubt it certainly looks like Terri had something to do with Kyron's disappearance. But honestly I don't think none of us here know for sure what she did or didn't do. And we sure don't know what was all going on inside that home either. We don't know if anybody was trying to save that marriage at all either. Maybe they were both sick of each other and wanted out. I'm sure most people would never think that a spouse or family member would ever kill anyone, even though red flags are everywhere.

ITA NRCG, never in a million yrs would I expect anything to nefarious to happen such as kidnapping or murder, but I guess I am just a worrier since I am a sticker who my kids can ride with, and a lush in the house would be off the list ASAP......even now that my daughter drives, since she is barely 19 and relatively inexperienced, I don't let my son ride with her either unless it's ONLY on the Island which is 4 streets wide, and the area she is allowed to drive in is a 2 mile area that is strictly residential, never near the public beach...... no traffic whatsoever, and the school is 3-4 blocks away and I make her take the least traveled road that is on the gulf OK, I know that sounds extreme but I am just a natural born worrier and I know most kids have a wreck in the first 4 yrs of driving, and it's also IIRC the leading cause of death so I justify my uptight behavoir by reminded myself those statistics. Add alcohol and not a shot in hell he'd ever be in that car. ITA also that we really don't know what was happening in regards to saving the marriage, what goes on behind closed doors in many homes would shock most of us
I hear you, I'm a natural born worrier as well. Oh, I'm sure what goes on behind closed doors in some homes would shock most of us. And that's just it, in a lot of cases we really don't know what was all going on, just making guesses with bits and pieces of info.
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« Reply #319 on: November 26, 2010, 12:26:42 PM »

My husband and I have joint and separate bank accounts. Maybe they had both as well? Maybe having all separate accounts is really a good idea.


Just some thoughts, but Terri and Kaine were not young newly weds.  If there were previous marriages, child support and etc. involved, this could be a possible reason for separate bank accounts.  Also, if one had good credit and the other didn't, this could be a reason for separate accounts.  And marriage really does have it's business aspects.  When you marry, you become subject to certain laws and obligations, depending on the state you live in.  I think sometimes people marry without considering the financial aspects and ramifications. My husband and I have joint accounts, but have been married for a long time.  When we first married, we had separate accounts for a couple of years, because we both were mature adults with jobs and assets.  I didn't see a sudden need to combine the accounts and neither did he.  Over time it all sort of evolved and we have joint accounts, but I tend to use one more than another for small household expenses, while the other account pays taxes and the bigger expenses.  All of it is "our" money, though.    How long were Terri and Kaine married?  I just don't think people get married and then go open joint accounts and merge everything right away (especially if they are older)  in this day and age,  for the reasons I mentioned in the beginning of this post.  I don't have access to Kaine and Terri's accounts, so I don't what's there.  Who made the house payments, paid the utilities, insurance, doctor bills and etc.?  Just some thoughts.  It's hard to compare different people's marriages and financial arrangements. What would seem right to some would be totally alien to others, imo.  JMHO
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